Preface: no brackety hugs needed, I just need to say this out loud (or in pixels).
I have the weird dizzy-making brain-zappy feelings one can get when going off (and back on, and then off) an SSRI antidepressant. (Skin still attached, almost no itchy left.)
And thanks to the whipsawing back and forth between on a drug, off a drug, on a drug, off a drug, my brain is like a funhouse at a carnival for the damned.
My sleep is kerfucked (try 4 hours last night), and I am bouncing back and forth between goofy and empty despair that I am a useless human being who is a drain on my boyfriend and hideous to boot. (Guess which side of the funhouse I'm in right now.)
I understand with the last 2 rational brain cells that are working that this is just because I've abused the holy hell out of my brain with the starting and stopping and starting and stopping, et al.
But my lizard brain is howling right now. And really overwhelmed. Also with, did I mention?, the OMG so hideous no one has ever been this enormously fat and hideous to look upon before and my boyfriend must be ashamed to be seen with me and my god I'm such a drain on him.
SRSLY, no hugs. I just feel less insane if I can actually say out loud what awful things are ricocheting around in this defective broken pudding of a brain.
But, skin still attached. So there's that.
Sometimes when you say the brain-crack out loud, you can get a feel for how ridiculous it is.
I'm glad you still have your skin, Steph.
Attached skin is a good thing.
I can't believe how much of my clothing I can throw into a goodwill bag without a second thought. Six full garbage bags already delivered and I am working on a 7th. I have to condense two dressers into one and I'm almost done. Some times I have to try something on, like to decide which of
five
shiny red sleeveless shirts to keep.
I love the description of Posey's personality. The calmer, 'going with the flow' puppy is definitely the way to go. And how great that the litter has been together through 3 months. That makes a HUGE difference in behavior down the road.
Congrats on the new potential family member PixDesigns!
omg I had two of the
exact same
skirt. Brand, model number & color. Sheesh.
I had two of the exact same skirt. Brand, model number & color. Sheesh.
That's how they last longer.
Though usually I mix up the colour. But I do have two of the same pair of jeans, and another of the same style in a size up. In case.
But I categorically have too much clothing.
"That's not right. We have to talk. You're at work, so we won't talk now, but we have to talk, because that's not right."
"There's nothing to discuss. This is what's right for me, it is the decision I've made, and until you accept that, there is nothing to discuss." ::radio silence::
Work is crazy. Long story, but I'm beyond slammed until next Wednesday minimum, and then will need to catch up on what I've let slide. Hello, stress!
eta WTF formatting?
Now I'm dithering about giving an Aslan happy meal toy to the goodwill. I doubt anyone will buy him but I just don't feel right about throwing Aslan in the trash.
Steph, I've been stepping down my Wellbutrin (mostly because I'm putting off dealing with finding a prescribing doc) and today I am in a foul foul foul horrible mental place.
Does it also have to do with finding out I didn't get a job, the fact it's been dark and rainy all day, and the fact that TULANE'S JOB WEBSITE makes me want to put my fist through my netbook!? I don't know. However, I feel like I'm jumping out of my skin.
