It's stupid to let him get to me. His logic is not of our earth logic and I know that. But he's been telling our family that I just up and decided to move and that he knows why I think we needed to move, but that what we think we heard is not what he said. And he doesn't remember conversations or what he said verbatim. Well I do. And what possible reason would I have to make this up? When I have no time, inclination, or money to fucking move????

And oh yeah - he's never felt "welcome" here. And he didn't think there was anything wring with him painting a fucking fence in the backyard at 9:00 PM on a freaking Wednesday.

Argh. At least you will be out from under his landlording soon!

That is fucked up beyond belief Aimee.

And a walk through? I know you guys are busy and everything but can ya'll take some pictures just in case he tries to be even more of an asshole and say things didn't look right.

Honestly, he can say what the fuck he wants. I have no lease, never had a lease, he has no certificate of occupancy, and the IRS and State of Michigan would be very interested in learning that a) he's been taking the property homestead tax credit on this house for two years when it WASN'T his primary and residence and b) he's not been claiming the income he's been making off our rent on any sort of income taxes.

At this point, as far as I'm concerned, he can kiss my ass. I'll repair the two things that we for sure need to because we did it, but beyond that -- fuck him. Fuck him straight in the ass.

And I will for sure take pictures.

Honestly, he can say what the fuck he wants. I have no lease, never had a lease, he has no certificate of occupancy, and the IRS and State of Michigan would be very interested in learning that a) he's been taking the property homestead tax credit on this house for two years when it WASN'T his primary and residence and b) he's not been claiming the income he's been making off our rent on any sort of income taxes.

Because I'm malicious, I think the State of Michigan should know these things, provided it doesn't create further hardship for you.

But then... malicious.

all of the editors names were in Hebrew

Send them over. I'll transcribe 'em back 'atcha.

Sox, if I were in your shoes, I'd go. I don't know how different shiva regulations are between the U.S. and here, but I suspect that not that much.

If you can come and pay your respects/condolences, I'm sure that will be much appreciated.

If they're of Ashkenazi orientation, it's a custom to bring food. If not, there will be plenty of food there. Either way, it's a mitzvah to eat something small at the grieving house.

Speaking of painting....I asked all my friends if they'd help me paint my old aparment. I hired movers but was all "please help me paint rather than helping me move!". Well I'm glad I wasn't counting on anyone to help me move...I'm alone in my apartment trying to paint the whole fucking thing myself. Fuck. I am so having a breakdown. I just can't do one more thing. An now I feel all friendless and like I have no one here I can count on and I hate life and blah blah unloveablecakes and not only do I not have a girlfriend I apparently don't even have any friends. Great. But I don't have time to curl up and die because I have to paint the damn apartment.

Hive- mind advice requested, specifically from those who can advise on shiva dos and don'ts. My much-loved boss from a previous job just lost her father after an illness and is sitting shiva this week. I knew this was coming but haven't figured out the best way to pay respects. I'd like to make the visit, but I do not want to impose. I can send a tray if that's better -she will know I made a special trip if I do go, and I don't want that to become a big deal.

The point of sitting shiva is that people are supposed to visit. If you know something about her in particular -- she has social anxiety or something like that -- that would make her less likely to want visitors, then maybe just call and see her later, but otherwise, it's not an imposition, it's a comfort.

Also, if you do bring or send food, it's a good idea to have it be something kosher, if that's possible. Even if the person sitting shiva doesn't keep kosher, food platters are usually set out for the visitors, and at least some of them will probably keep kosher.

And now I feel all friendless and like I have no one here I can count on and I hate life and blah blah unloveablecakes and not only do I not have a girlfriend I apparently don't even have any friends.

You're very, very lovable. I just got unexpectedly caught up today. But I will come help paint. And move the closet stuff from the old place to the new.

I'll text you later with updates.

With shiva I've always been told to not take flowers. I do not know why or if this is widespread.