Zoe: Is there any way I'm gonna get out of this with honor and dignity? Wash: You're pretty much down to ritual suicide, lambie-toes.

'War Stories'


Spike's Bitches 45: That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure.  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


Daisy Jane - Mar 31, 2010 11:57:37 am PDT #14503 of 30000
"This bar smells like kerosene and stripper tears."

Which is why I want her to come over and do our house. That house was originally my step father's. Since they've been married she's torn out the front and back walls and put in French doors and windows, gutted and remodeled the kitchen and dining room and re done the two living rooms, office, weird x-tra rooms and 2 bedrooms. Next up are the bathrooms.


Barb - Mar 31, 2010 11:59:54 am PDT #14504 of 30000
“Not dead yet!”

Yay, DJ's mom! And that garden is to DIE for, seriously.


Toddson - Mar 31, 2010 12:10:14 pm PDT #14505 of 30000
Friends don't let friends read "Atlas Shrugged"

Dear coworker: I sent out a message this morning telling everyone that I'm going to be out on Friday. The idea was that everyone, even those who don't consult the office calendar, would be aware that I was going to be out and, if they needed me for something, would be able to schedule around it.

So why did you schedule the conference call for which I MUST be here for Friday?

No love,

me


Hil R. - Mar 31, 2010 12:33:52 pm PDT #14506 of 30000
Sometimes I think I might just move up to Vermont, open a bookstore or a vegan restaurant. Adam Schlesinger, z''l

178 applications. I think I'm somewhere around 50 actual rejections, and at least 30 more where I know they hired someone else but they didn't send me anything to tell me that I'm not hired. Officemate once again asked me what I think I'm doing wrong. My answer of "There are a ton of people applying for not too many positions, and my qualifications probably put me somewhere in the middle of the field," was not good enough.

Random conversation with other officemate. I walked into the office, and he asked, "Hillary, are you vegan?!" I said yes. He said, "Since when?" I said, "Last May." He said, "But, I've seen you eat food in this office!" I said, "Yes, vegans do still eat." He said, "You mean all of that food had no meat in it?" I said "No." He spent the next several minutes shaking his head in amazement.


Polter-Cow - Mar 31, 2010 1:04:35 pm PDT #14507 of 30000
What else besides ramen can you scoop? YOU CAN SCOOP THIS WORLD FROM DARKNESS!

I'm shaking my head in amazement.


Hil R. - Mar 31, 2010 1:20:06 pm PDT #14508 of 30000
Sometimes I think I might just move up to Vermont, open a bookstore or a vegan restaurant. Adam Schlesinger, z''l

Ugh. I always forget that matzo has a ton of simple carbs, and then I feel sick after a few days of Passover.


Scrappy - Mar 31, 2010 2:45:55 pm PDT #14509 of 30000
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

So, say a person was going to be on TV, working in her yard. She wants to do something with her nails... but what? They will need to be shortish, but would a color be interesting? She is not allowed to wear blue, as Fome Fepot is a sponsor and blue is the color of their dread rival, Schmowe's (this is true--the information sheet they gave us said no blue). So a pale green? A sparkly gold? These are what this person usually wears, but this person is usually in an office. She does not want to look oddly overdressed for yardwork, as this is not Green Acres and she will not be wearing a caftan.


Barb - Mar 31, 2010 2:46:57 pm PDT #14510 of 30000
“Not dead yet!”

But dahling, a caftan would be oh, so stylish!

I think green. Go for that eco-glow look to your nails.


DavidS - Mar 31, 2010 2:52:23 pm PDT #14511 of 30000
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I vote for whatever sets off your hair.


Zenkitty - Mar 31, 2010 2:56:42 pm PDT #14512 of 30000
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.

I hope your cousin doesn't have to wait, DJ. That's too scary. IOyouN, I'm using those photos of your mom's gorgeous house as a blueprint for my own pitiful attempts at landscaping.

sumi, eek. job~ma.

Scrappy, I'm looking forward to your tale of being on tv! I say go with the green nails.

I am caught up with work. Huh. This is unsettling. I don't know what to do with my time when I don't have a crashing deadline.