( continues...)

[Oh, and I remember the first time I felt like I wasn't just a name-on-a-screen to somebody else, that I became a person to somebody's screen, not just opinions-on-a-tv-show. It was in a discussion with ita (IIRC, something to do with Xander and Anya, but I am really not sure how RC this is). She wrote something to the effect of "you're wrong. First of, because you are, and second, because actual-reason-blah-blah-blah-I-can't-remember-any-of-it-cakes".

And I was thrilled, because, hey, the stranger on the internet joked with me, and trusted that I would understand the humor, and didn't worry about walking-on-eggshells the way you do with complete strangers, the way you have to in order to be completely polite around them and only let your guard down among people you feel more comfortable with. I was a "let your font's guard down" person, yay (also, easily thrilled, or so it seemed).

It still took me quite some time to dare to play games with English, to flow with my thoughts when I type, and to discover how large are the paragraphs I can throw at the screen if I don't pay attention. Um, pretty much like right now, so I better shut my keyboard up. That's definitely one thing I've learned since delurking: I need three posts and 17 paragraphs in order to say "Timelies!". Um, wasn't I shutting my keyboard up now? Yeah, right.]

[Edit: and now, really-now, tonight, taking care of a sick throwing-up infant - 3 times he woke up, I stayed awake watching him, making sure I'm there for him if he wakes up again, and looking for something to keep me awake when he nods back to sleep in my lap, this PiToddler whom I could never have imagined all those years ago, I haven't even dared dreading someone as wonderful as himself or his sister could ever exist in the world - I find this lovely game in this lovely thread, and I just gulp it - no skimming or skipping! In fact, if he manages to sleep now, I may actually attempt a meara! - and as it so often happens, when I need to know that I'm not all alone in whatever-it-is that is going on right now, I turn to you guys, and you're there. Not "there for me", just there, but rather, the very fact of you being there, is more "there for me" than I ever need, if that makes any sense at all.

OK, really shutting my keyboard up now. Really.]

I LOVE NILLY AND THAT IS ALL BECAUSE SHE IS THE AWESOMESAUCE ON OUR BUFFISTACAKE.

Pfft, you are the nicest! Of course you'd say that!

[Edit: I've been editing my former post instead of throwing all sorts of pink ponts at your screen, what a sad waste of time.]

Yeah! And your English is good, Nilly. Foreign- reading but in a way that is pleasant.

Oh, erika! He also was wearing the pants he got as a present from you and your mom on the holiday that just ended! They're just the right length now (last year, I had to fold the bottoms). I need to check if the shirt is still good for him.

The problem is, I never manage to take his picture with these clothes, because he's usually wearing them on shabbat or a holiday, when I don't use a camera. I need to rectify that. And, um, not just because, to my completely objective eyes, he's the most beautiful little boy I've ever seen.

[Edit: which is a very long and strange way of speling "thank you", isn't it?]

Nilly, you are one of many exemplars of what the best of this us is. It's been a privilege to get to see your journey.

Oh, sara! That's what I think of you. Thank you.

(Every year, on Sukkot, I remember how you wrote, many many Natter threads ago, about how you see the sukkot built around where you live.)

Nilly! I love to see you and I love your Buffista coming-out story!

Nilly's "Timelies!" are the best!

Aww, Nilly. You are the Nilliest.