A way to make money if you're an atheist: Eternal Earth-Bound Pets, USA

You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.

We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you've received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus.

We are currently active in 20 states and growing. Our representatives have been screened to ensure that they are atheists, animal lovers, are moral / ethical with no criminal background, have the ability and desire to rescue your pet and the means to retrieve them and ensure their care for your pet's natural life.

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Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable. For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged friends.

Does anyone know how to build an ark?

There's this book that will give you the dimensions, but it's a little vague on the actual construction details.

By the way, a cubit is 2.1872266 meters.

Thanks, Vortex!

Yes, Jesse, that makes sense, thanks. I watched some neighbors attempt to burn several years of financial documents on their hibachi once, and it was kind of scary. Sure, their identity's safe, but they wouldn't care if their home was a smoking ruin.

By the way, a cubit is 2.1872266 meters.

When playing Cubit, don't jump on a square with a snake.

re: Ark

You may need to figure out a replacement for the gopher wood.

You may need to figure out a replacement for the gopher wood.

Woodchuck wood?

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck woodchuck wood replacement for gopher wood?

Thanks, all. This is very helpful information.

While we're on the subject, what's the best way to get cats in a boat? My sister-in-law would never forgive me if I let them drown.

While we're on the subject, what's the best way to get cats in a boat?

Catapult. Or did you mean while the boat is docked?

Here you go, quester: [link]