Ooh, that Groupon looks great! And today's NYC deal was for a restaurant I like, but which is a little pricey -- too bad it sold out.

Groupon does look very cool. I just signed up for the DC emails.

This Groupon gets new-to-Lillian customers an x-ray and cleaning from Dr. Lillian Obucina, a former Northwestern University dental professor who lectures for the American Dental Association and Comic Con.

THAT IS AWESOME.

That is all.

When did Hispanic start being considered non-white? During a discussion of historical race relations, I got curious and tried searching a few names like Lopez and Garcia in the ancestry.com databases, and at least through the thirties, "color" was recorded as white. (Figuring out what the terms actually meant on those older forms is interesting. "Color" and "race" are separate categories, and then there's another for "complexion." For my ancestors, Color was white, Race was Hebrew, and Complexion could be either fair, medium, olive, or swarthy, depending on who was recording it.)

Dunno, but I was always the gringa.

Dinner tonight was six frozen chicken nuggets. I'd actually thawed bison to make meatloaf, but seeing as how I just had a temper tantrum over knocking down some chess pieces, I was clearly in no mood to cook.

I also loathe the term colorblind because it mostly means that you're not interested in me. My color damned well matters and if you don't think so, then I'll be happy to live in your rosy world, but until I do, open your eyes. You better know I'm paying attention to your color, and I'd be a liar if I said I weren't.

The other thing I've been getting cranky about in meatspace is people being/acting surprised when I express something about racial prejudice I've experienced. I realize this is partly because I'm only now becoming more vocal about it. The comments themselves are innocuous enough, stuff like "I can't imagine" or "I'd never have thought" but the effect is subtly to undermine my statements.

Really? Really you don't think I have a fucking difficult time finding a church that doesn't openly object either to me directly or to my interracial marriage? Really you don't think people in your neighborhood or family have made directly racist statements to or about me? Really you don't understand that the reason I think about it so much is because it's happening to me all the time, in all aspects of my life?

But I'm tired of it. Part of white privilege continues because people are ignorant and that allows them to continue their indifference. Well, buck up, soldiers, because I'm done with your denial. I don't get the luxury of pretending it doesn't exist, and if you want to hang around me, then you don't get it either. What you wanna do at that point is your own deal.

I'd put an end cranky tag on, but it wouldn't be truthful.

I just friended my high school chem2 teacher on fb. OK, she was cool and all, but how weird?

Dear Loki-

Kleenex box is not your personal shredder toy.

Love

me

The comments themselves are innocuous enough, stuff like "I can't imagine" or "I'd never have thought" but the effect is subtly to undermine my statements.

Thanks for saying this, because I'm sure I've said similar things without being really aware of their impact. To me, it feels like an acknowledgment that you face something I don't have to. But really, the end of that sentence is "I can't imagine...living outside of my white privilege." And that imagining is something I need to do. It's better, I think, than saying "I understand how hard that is" because yo. But I can see where it may be very dismissive.

There are similar, but far from identical, dynamics that play out on the gender side. Even there, though, I struggle with knowing what the appropriate response is.

The "I don't see color" thing is fucking appalling. How nice for you. What fucking world do you live in? It's in the same vein as the whole "rich and poor alike" are prohibited from sleeping in the park. [Flashbacks to the fight over Atlanta's "anti-camping" laws. Ugh.]

When your skin isn't white, you don't have the luxury of being color-blind.

Which reminds me of something that confused/irritated me about comments about Gaiman's Anansi Boys--the fact that only the white characters were noted as such was supposed to indicate that the main character was black, I guess because black people don't identify same.

The ones I'm used do. Maybe not as much in Jamaica, but there we're busy noticing skin tone anyway.

When did Hispanic start being considered non-white?

It isn't on most of the forms I've filled out recently. Hispanic or not is a different question from race.