I want him as un-shut-up-able as an omnisexual college freshman feminist vegan nader-voting socialist communist virgin lefty raised by Baptist Mormon Jehovah's Witness Jews for Jesus radical veiled Muslims.

I love Trudy. As much as she loves Tao.

I don't dive, and am physically incapable of doing it (seriously, the body just reacts) because of one instructor who thought the best way to overcome my trepidation was to flip my feet out from under me. Me, who is and was wary to trust to begin with. Yeah, big old NO.

My mom is a lousy swimmer, mainly because her mother was a good one & a sailor. Mom is bad at any math algebra and up, because her mom was the teacher. See a theme? (Wonder where I get my contrary from???)

So today I: walked to the market, bought more cherry tomatoes of various varieties and peaches and plums and cukes than I can possibly consume. Then I: went to the salvage place and went through 3 warehouses (missed the sinks one) and dug through eons worth of strike plates and didn't find what I was looking for. Didn't find my tile, either. Then I went out to Ellicott City and got my hair cut and caught my lovely hairdresser up on my trip & shenanigans and combed through more antique store's hardware bins, fruitlessly. Then I did a Target and TJs run and forgot hummus, which I am living on at the moment. Then I came home and vacuumed and mopped, showered again, and now I'm doing laundry.

I still need to borrow a saw and finish mauling my stupid bush, hit up Home Despot, and I just discovered my brother gave me a $100 Bloodbath&Beyond card (I thought it was for $25, that's what I told him I needed!) so I might splurge and get another queen sized set of my fancypants beech sheets.

Can I have a cookie??

::passes cookies to sarameg AND msbelle, because she needs them, too::

I cannot dive. As comfortable as I am in the water, that's the one thing I am apparently not wired for. I used to be able to, thanks in part to my dad teaching me like a drill instructor (this is why he decided *not* to teach music, in the end, because he's a crappy teacher).

But I realized years later, as an adult, I can't even do a dive from a sitting position. *Cannot* go into the water headfirst. I can *be* underwater, but I just can't make myself go in that way. Very strange.

And Jess, yeah. You know your kid. I hate instructors who think one way is going to work for every kid.

I hate instructors who think one way is going to work for every kid.

I'm going to posit that works for almost NO kid. It's sucky. The only possible positive scenario I can see is if there is some sort of ducking 'game' to it. And even then you have to nix the game if they're not into it.

I've taught a lot of children to swim. I've taught a handfull of fearful adults as well who even if they didn't get over their anxiety completely became much more comfortable and capable in the water. If any of you ever wants to work on it let me know.

sara, I will tell you what I am telling everyone. If you have the money, buy a set of mattress encasements. Seriously.

we got back in the water today and the kids were blissfully unaffected by yesterday's adventure.

Thanks, everyone. I think a scare or two is pretty standard according to others, experiences.

msbelle, you continue to handle your situation with strength and grace. I remain impressed.

Dh called me today to say he mises us and wants us to come home early. He's bored and lonely, poor guy.

Cashmere, let me agree with whomever said earlier that it was not Parent Fail at ALL -- children are wily, quick, little creatures and you DID keep a sharp eye on them.

Still, scary as fuck!

Thanks Amy and Cashmere - nice things are nice to hear. I've been listening to my own voice in my head too much.

mac is having a hard time not sitting on the couch. But once he gets in the recliner he likes it more I think. I will have lost the recliner as my seat.

They really are right.

So the downstairs flush needs it's float flushed (it's running and for god knows how long.) I can barely recall how to do it and just don't have it in me tonight. So I shut off the valve.

I want to get a sign like this made to hang over my kitchen door: [link]

I like having my travels mark my home.