any statement like that "real man", "not a jerk", "no games", "no drama" - it means this: There are these other people I dated that I didn't end up liking, or they broke my heart - don't be like them.

Exactly!! It also means the person is maybe not a terribly original thinker or a particularly good writer and that may be a reason to not respond to them. I know I wouldn't have.

I see a lot of requests from men that state that they "don't want any drama" and "no games."

I think that may mean straightforward and not doing things like: I want you to do X but I tell you not to do X because if you really care about me you'll do X anyhow. If you don't do X I'm going to be really pissed at you, but not tell you why.

I think they(we) are happy with the gender we were born into, so I am a ciswoman.(Smile when you say that, stranger.) I think.

I am sure it is not what they mean, but like my life would be WAY too much drama for a lot of people who would say something like that. It's real life and it's messy.

Lots of people wouldn't consider starting to date someone who:

has a child
is going through a divorce
has an ill parent
has a needy sibling/cousin/friend
is in recovery

it's like Robin said about looking at the list before the person.

Hmmm.... I'm not all that cis. I think I'm pretty androgynous. I mean, when I sense someone expects me to play the "male" role it really rubs me the wrong way.

Which way would you like them to rub you?

Oh, you know what else "real man" could mean? "You can keep a job and not be a low down dirty lazy sob, like that cowturd I just left."

I think there's a pretty big difference between playing a "male" role and being a man.

I sometimes say one of the things that I like about J is that he is a true man. In my case, I mean as opposed to a boy, in that he is responsible and supportive and dependable.

ION, msbelle should check out the kitchen on this house for sale in Portland: [link]