Well, it seems like living that way one should be prepared to fight a lot. It might be worth it, but it wasn't in terms of rebuilding with the old man...I think that is deader than hair bands...I would have said "disco" but that seems like what Lady Gaga is so...

Speaking of not being able to set boundaries with parents, my mother is currently washing my kitchen floor. She knows it's not an easy task for me, so I have pretty much given up arguing with her.

I have an apple upside-down cake in the oven, and I am crossing my fingers that it comes out ok. I don't think I have ever baked a cake from scratch before. I still have a TON of apples left. Does anyone have baking recipes with apples to share or possibly an apple chutney recipe.

I just had to yell at some of my "good" students because they came into my office to ask me a question about an email that I had sent, and was told "Oh, I didn't read the whole email". I kinda went off about it.

Does anyone have baking recipes with apples to share or possibly an apple chutney recipe.

what kind of apples?

You guys, I know it's probably a weird coincidence, but I was reading about the poor little girl killed in Florida, and in the article her aunt is named Laura H. Is this our Laura? I don't know if she reads both Natter and Spike, so am going to ask in both places.

How irritating are those recorded sales phone calls? I hate that they're getting increasingly clever about it too. "This is an important announcement, and not a sales call." (So I give them a couple of extra seconds.) "Government estimations are that 70% of people don't have a will, so -" (I see where this is going and cut them off.) I had to get out of my seat and go to the next room to answer that crap, which isn't an easy task. Irritating.

Sometimes I forget how lucky I am that my parents have come through the coming out/wedding/baby stuff with flying colors.

Oh, me too (minus baby) - my parents are truly awesome about my relationship. I should probably be more appreciative of this than I usually am.

what kind of apples?

We picked them from a bunch of different types of trees, so there is a mix of macintosh, gala, and a couple other varieties that I cannot remember at the moment.

My parents have flat out asked me not to share certain things with them. For example, drunken rugby stories. It was the one about the ref joining my team in mooning a bunch of Dookies that called us "dykes" that put them over the edge. Hey, I thought it was awesome that a straight middle-aged dude would show that kind of solidarity.

It IS awesome. They should film that and show it every Xmas.

No, the little girl was not my niece, javachik.

Skimmed a couple hundred or so posts and I have this comment -

Don't you people see me when I nod my head sympathetically and send loving thoughts?!?!?!

Also grateful for the relationship I have with my parents and in-laws. I haven't lived near them since I was 18 - 37 years ago! The past couple years I have spent the summer next door to mom and we can talk about anything. But being 55 years old and having been through the things that we have gone through together over the decades has built that bond. She has freely given me her opinion over the years, but never in a way that implied an expectation to do what she suggested. I hope I have this relationship with my children and their spouses when that time comes. I'm going to tell them what I think, but I expect them to do as they please.

Also, {{Bitches}}

Gosh, David, he said he doesn't like telling *blatant* lies. That might be something that isn't part of your moral code, but it hardly qualifies as rigid and simplistic, or adolescent.

His definition of a blatant lie is part of what I find rigid and simplistic and also prideful. Any equivocation or dissembling is a blatant lie. It's not responsive to how people interact, and is more concerned with defining himself. And that's the part that I also think is adolescent; thrashing around like a teenager yelping "it's not fair" is - to my mind - a protest of powerlessness (which is the irritating thing because he has more power and agency to deal with this issue than he's willing to take) and a complaint that people don't deal with him on his terms (in the exciting world of blunt object truths).

I'm sorry, P-C, I know that's harsh. But that's as blatantly truthful as I can be on the matter.

You have the power to establish boundaries with your parents. That is your responsibility as an adult. Quit bitching that the boundaries aren't there. You have to create them. Everybody does. That is one of your primary tasks as an adult.