Spike's Bitches 44: It's about the rules having changed.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
I don't generally ask for ~ma, but I need my Bitches this weekend. Sunday is the first anniversary of my dad's death, and my mother is already extra crazy. Today alone, I've been accused of not caring about her because I wasn't going to spend the entire day with her on Sunday (I'd planned to spend the night with her and spend the day working through my own grief), making her look like a fool for asking my aunt to go see her on Sunday (because it means that her daughter doesn't care enough to be there), she cancelled going my goddaughter's first birthday party that we were supposed to go to on Saturday because she couldn't laugh with someone who treats her like I do.
Normally I try to let the crazy roll off my back, but between the PMS and my own grief, I am really fried. Bro and BFF are being awesome, but I need all of the help I can get.
Ahhh, Vortex, that's tough. Your mom's got a crazy whirl going on now and you don't want to get sucked into that. Even though you're somewhat obliged to be near her. The thing is, nothing's going to fill that absence for her and she keeps getting mad at you for not being pain-ease.
She's not doing a good job of working through her shit.
But know that it's her shit. Boundaries, baby! You gotta enforce a few.
And make space for your own grief, because I know how close you were to your dad. Maybe you can find some room to celebrate and remember more. Go eat some place that you both loved. Go walking some place that you shared. Watch a movie that was a connection. Something like that. Remember him in that warm way instead of the achey way (if you can). Though I'm sure the ache is there anyhow.
I'm amused because rouge vs rogue are a couple of similar words I had to stop and sound out a lot when I was younger.
Especially when I was writing a report on Henry Ford's The Rouge auto plant.
My teacher thought it inadvisable of me to try and claim it was a rogue idea to build The Rouge.
Even though it totally was.
All the together~ma to you Vortex.
Hanging in there ~ma for you, Vortex. I know you're smart enough to know it's not in any way your fault that your mom can't yet fully cope and is taking her loneliness out on you, but it doesn't make being in proximity to it any easier.
I'll be thinking of you this weekend, babe. Sending lots of thoughts.
~ma for you Vortex.
ImeN, I think I'm hitting that point of catching a cold where I get whiny. I went to the CVS to get some day/night pills that I got last year that worked. Standing there looking at options of qty and stuff, it seems I grabbed the name brand NyQuil/DayQuil instead of the CVS version. (fail #1). I take one when I get to work. It's making me a lil light headed, thankfully I took a HALF dose! (fail #2). And my nose is STILL running!! (fail #3)!
t /whine
(Hopefully that tag stays closed for awhile)
Laga, how goes it with the Fires? Is your Bro & family safe??
Sean, I have no clue where your new digs are. I saw in FB you were breathing it in, are you doing ok??
Vortex, much punctuation and ~ma to you for getting through this weekend. Hec is wise: Listen to Hec.
Has anyone seen this animation on the health care debate:
[link]
(safe for work, no nudity or bad words or anything like that)
I hate that your mom takes her grief out on you, Vortex. My MiL was much the same to my husband - the good news is, six years later she's much more reasonable. Lots of ~ma to get through this weekend.
