Echoing beth here, Cash.

That sounds like the most sensible option to me, Cash.

Cash, in your shoes, that is what I'd do. You want what's best for her safety and health.

Excellent Plan, Cashmere.

My burning question of the day: How does someone get to be a senior patent litigation paralegal without knowing the difference between USPTO.gov and USPTO.com?

USPTO.com is a private web site not affiliated with any governmental agency.

SEE!

Plus of course, we went through several rounds of "okay, go to USPTO.gov. Do you see the link for patents? No, okay, make sure you are on USPTO.gov. Do you see the link for patents? No, okay, are you on USPTO.gov?"

I was a bad girl and used the company account to purchase personal items at a wholesale shop. No one would have found out except that I returned items, got a store credit, and they mailed said credit to work. Now boss wants to pay me the full amount (the items I purchased were a gift for his MIL), have me go to the shop and argue to have the store credit put in my name. Then he wants me to then use the store credit later to purchase whatever we might need for work, and I'll pay for it (or maybe I have that wrong, maybe it's then that the store credit is mine to spend on myself, and I have to also then buy something for work of equal value, which would mean that I now have twice the money tied up at the shop). Then he wants me to then fill out a reimbursement form and get paid back from work for the amount of the store credit. I'm so confused.

He seems to be implying that I've basically put money in Work's pocket, but the hoops he wants me to jump through seem to reflect more on paperwork. And it's so convoluted that I can't figure out if it actually makes sense. I was just going to use the store credit to buy myself flowers or something (since it was all my money to begin with).

I have no idea that if I successfully do all of these things, if I will come out ahead or behind or where I'm supposed to be.

Or maybe the hoop-jumping is my punishment for using work's account.

*headdesk*

I have so much cleaning/putting away/errands to run before my parents get here. And I have to go out to the UPS facility tomorrow because UPS can't deliver at reasonable times. (Srsly, they said between 2 and 5, which I might squeak in if it is a late delivery. They came at 12:30. Um.) And the pet/housesitting is coming and will see the place in disarray. And must gas up the car. And figure out long term parking at Dulles. And andandANDAND.

And I've spent all week dealing with crazy teams who seem to fail to understand that once I leave, my backups, while good, aren't me, and don't know the full scope, which is why I've been setting up things ahead of time.

AND I will be missing the astronaut visit! WOE!!!!

And now my brother had made me need brain bleach: a photo of him in a very tight wrestling jumper and a straw hat.

This is why we can't embarrass him with naked baby pictures.