{{Theodosia}} You do not suck as a caretaker because you care. It is caretakers that don't give a crap that suck. I'm sorry it is so difficult. I had so many fights with my dad and husband over getting them to do what they were supposed to do when caring for them. Fighting with those you love when they are sick, that sucks.
My mom used to can plum preserves that were very yummy. We had a tree that produces zillions of them. They were tart and sweet and delish. I'll have to ask her how she managed that.
Did we hear how ita made out with her procedure? I did some skippage. I really hope it helps.