No one plowed our driveway today. So, TCG is having to shovel through the huge snow bank that the road plows left and I'm sitting uselessly in the car.

For a hardcore romantic, I'm not much for poetry. Which is kind of sad, actually. But I do love the gestures. I love the grand, roses and champagne, gestures. But perhaps even more, I love the small ones-- like Lewis knowing I'm fighting a migraine and bringing me a cheese stick because he's thinking maybe a little protein will help.

Sort of how I love fine lingerie, but give me flannel sheets and inside pants and I feel like I'm sinking in luxury.

I'm probably guilty of telling TCG too often how much I love him. I want him to know that despite my too often depressed moods that I am truly grateful and still in awe of the fact that I have him in my life. He isn't as good with words, but he is still very good at showing me how much he loves me.

But I do love the gestures. I love the grand, roses and champagne, gestures. But perhaps even more, I love the small ones-- like Lewis knowing I'm fighting a migraine and bringing me a cheese stick because he's thinking maybe a little protein will help.

Without the small, everyday thoughtful moments, grand gestures are hollow. In fact, I would venture to say, though I have never been married so what do I know, that it is easier for a marriage to succeed where the small, ordinary caring moments flourish and grand gestures are non-existent, than for a marriage to succeed on all grand gestures and no small kindnesses. Grand gestures are icing on cake - if the cake is foul, it doesn't matter how great the icing is; but, really good cake goes down real nice without any frosting at all.

TCG is so much better with the little things than the grand gestures. I think the grand gestures make him nervous, like he is going to do the wrong thing. However, on a daily basis he is a rock. Right now he is a sore, cranky, snow shovelling rock, but he's still a rock. I plan on expressing my love tonight by leaving him to his bad mood instead of trying to cheer him up, which he hates.

It's the very rare modern man (outside of the movies) who's willing to say, with or without poetry, "We haven't known each other long, but you amaze me. Since we met, I've been unable to think of anything but you. You are beautiful and funny and inspire me to great heights. If I could see you every day, I would."

This made my jaw drop. It is a difficult edge to walk, but sometimes these things do need to be said, somehow. In the right context.

Poem needs to be good. Heartfelt often qualifies. Delivery is not important, but doing it in a private way is.

also raising my emotional intelligence level: what JZ and Teppy said.

and

In fact, I would venture to say, though I have never been married so what do I know, that it is easier for a marriage to succeed where the small, ordinary caring moments flourish and grand gestures are non-existent, than for a marriage to succeed on all grand gestures and no small kindnesses. Grand gestures are icing on cake - if the cake is foul, it doesn't matter how great the icing is; but, really good cake goes down real nice without any frosting at all.

I love this thread.

thanks for the support last night. It was a craptastic end to a good day.

Shir - all the peace~ma in the world headed your way.

Without the small, everyday thoughtful moments, grand gestures are hollow.

Absolutely. And I'd even add that you get to a point where the small, everyday thoughtful gestures can take on the same weight and meaning as the grand ones.

You don't have to be married to be wise about it, girl. IJS...

It's too quiet in here tonight. I need a little distraction until I can get in my warm, cozy apartment and make cocoa. I forgot to bring a book and being alone with my brain is not good right now.

Hubby and I were just looking at the cute Jilli-in-the-snow pictures, and he's now wondering how tall the Buffistas are in comparison to me. I'm 5'2", and Hubby's curious if any of the female Buffistas are more than 6 inches taller than I.

I don't know why, but I think he's thinking that "Cupcake Goth is cute and looks short. My wife is cute and is short. There could be similar cuteness in the future."

I'm barely 5' 8", so I don't quite qualify for the "more than 6 inches taller" thing.