Hey Emily - come to Michigan for New Year's and stay with us.

I am his entire social life.

I have been down this road for most of my marriage. It's a very difficult thing to sustain, FTR. Now, of course, he's turned into a talky meat person, and I'm looking at him like, "Do I even know you?"

It's a very difficult thing to sustain, FTR.

Good gracious, yes. It's been just 3 months and I'm having a hard time. But decades?

Now, of course, he's turned into a talky meat person, and I'm looking at him like, "Do I even know you?"

Heh. I'm trying to imaging KBD chatting up the world, and failing.

Coffee and donut:

Toddson is my favorite kind of evil.

Smonster, same problem with my housemate Charlie. I am so looking forward to moving in the Spring. We've lived together in 3 different houses and he's over time become more and more hermit-like. Now that he's retired, it's untenable.

My boyfriend is also very introverted but he does have friends with whom he gets together occasionally. I don't think I could deal with being someone's sole link to the outside world for very long. I'm sorry to hear this about KBD because so much of what you say about him sounds dandy (except the part where he didn't recycle before you met him!).

I don't think I could deal with being someone's sole link to the outside world for very long.

Man, that would drive me crazy! I wonder how people like that even find mates in the first place. I mean, they must be somewhat social to be able to attract someone?

Man, that would drive me crazy! I wonder how people like that even find mates in the first place. I mean, they must be somewhat social to be able to attract someone?

Well, Tom is like this to some extent. He met his mate (me) through a common social thing, the Buffistas. But it wasn't *his* thing, it was *our* thing before there even was an "us."

He has social anxiety, it is true, but he would like more friends in the geographic area. He has some in the UK and some in California (they used to live in Scotland) but he moved over here when he was in his late 20s and didn't know anyone- which is hard. He did try, with the Buffistas at first, and he's been social with the neighbors (there's a Brit-American couple next door that he is comfortable with). He's been reaching out to former co-workers now that most of them are out of the company. Joining the homebrew club helped too, though that was with me too.

But everyone else he know, he knows through me, which makes him think they aren't "his" friends, even though everyone adores him.

A few weeks ago was like the first time he was out and about being social with a friend, without me. I stayed at home and waited for his drunk ass to call me for a pickup from the train station- it's always the other way around.

It's becoming increasingly obvious that I'd be safer planning to send New Year's cards rather than Christmas cards. I can only hope we're not talking about 2010.

I was pondering using this Benjamin Franklin quote:

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man.

Does "a better man" ping anyone? Should I be politically correct and historically incorrect as say "a better person"? Should I leave off giving people advice from long-dead people?

Other possibilities:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

For last year's words belong to last year's language
And next year's words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.
- T.S. Eliot

Personally, I've never had a problem with the use of "man" or "men" in older material. Including hymns (in large part because the "updates" tend to suck -- poetry is hard enough ONCE, you know?).

Fly-by posting to say:

yay, to Sparky on the sparklette!! yaya!!!!!

{{{vw}}} I am glad you recognize your own achievements. You work hard for them.

all kinds of ~ma for ita today. I really hope this treatment works.