I don't know if I'd do so well with the groping at a F2F. I can do hugs and leans and light snuggles, but anything more personal would likely result in unpleasantness. Though I could probably be persuaded into light pecks.

This is me, and I did fine at the LA F2F with exactly those boundaries.

I just had an epiphany here--I tend not to enjoy loud bar scenes, like a typical hotel bar at a writers conference, or typical noisy dance party or club scenes, despite being a person who likes music, dancing, and having a few drinks with friends.

It's the noise.

For some reason I have a harder time than average picking out one thread of noise from a crowded, echoing room. I guess it's not easy for anyone, but I can't, and I know I must be worse than most people because so many people have been surprised and frustrated at my lack of ability to understand them even when they're practically shouting into my ear.

That's why gatherings like that stress me out so badly, and why I'm fine with noise when I'm alone, or when there's no expectation of conversation. Like, baseball games are fine because the only time the ambient noise is too loud to talk over is when you wouldn't want to be talking anyway.

Don't know why it took me so long to realize it, except maybe that I try to so hard to avoid such gatherings because I don't enjoy them.

I remember meeting Deb Grabien and her saying "I don't hug!" and it was good to know in advance.

Not that I'm a big hugger without having to force myself to hug when appropriate.

There are times that Windsparrow does not want to be hugged, and I'm getting pretty good at the signals.

My developing rules for all hugging activities are "wait, watch or inquire if unsure."

98% of the time is hanging out in smaller groups for excursions and whatnot that are grope-free (was there groping at The House on the Rock???)

No gropes that I recall seeing. A lot of goggling at the displays.

I mean, if you really don't want to take chances, just announce "Do NOT grope me!"

Or you could wear a red button!

I don't think anyone groped me. Although Juliana did straddle me.

But what would grope-friendly people wear?

Candy bras, of course!!

Tries to picture candy bra as an accessory over the dress(es) I wore to the Prom. It's definitely a distinctive look.

I guess I was just surprised to hear a few people talk about feeling overwhelmed or freaked out, especially when among friends. I would think that would be unusual so to have a few people say that, it just makes me wonder.

For me, those feelings are not caused by touching/hugging/groping. They are caused by an introverted need to not be surrounded by a lot of people. Sensory overload with all the talking and energy and pretty and shiny and people.

Tries to picture candy bra as an accessory over the dress(es) I wore to the Prom. It's definitely a distinctive look.

That's because there is no candy bra that will cover your lovely rack.

For me, those feelings are not caused by touching/hugging/groping. They are caused by an introverted need to not be surrounded by a lot of people. Sensory overload with all the talking and energy and pretty and shiny and people.

Me, too. Has way more to do with the sheer number of people than the actions of those people. I get that way at extended family functions and there is NO groping or kisssing there cause ew.

That's because there is no candy bra that will cover your lovely rack.

I'm seriously blushing. My rack thanks you for the compliment.

But yeah, those things really aren't intended for the D-Cup and above crowd, huh?

Guess we'll just have to let them remain on the chest of certain Miraculous types.

Also I think the touchy.kissy stuff is pretty much all at the prom. The dinerr.outings. hanging out is very low key and friendly and fun. Reminded me of hanging out in college, where there are a lot of folks around whom you like and it's easy to fall into conversation with one or many peeps. Like. you walk out a doorway and there's Jilli! And you can stop and hang out! Or you go to the cafe and there's Allyson and Polgara! And you can sit down and eat and chat! Stuff like that. At the LA F2F, I went to In n Out with Kat and Lori, and who else came along buy Fay! And we got eat and talk, just the four of us--and it was AWESOME.

They are caused by an introverted need to not be surrounded by a lot of people. Sensory overload with all the talking and energy and pretty and shiny and people

Yup. Groping is not the problem for me. I'm not a natural born hugger from the standpoint of, I don't think everyone is dying to have me run right over and hug them as soon as I see them. I don't think to intiate hugs unless it's someone I've known a very long time. I will, however, accept any hug that is intiated on me. I love hugs, I'm just hug-initiate deficiant. A mild grope in good humor is well and good, too. Just, don't grab the back of my neck from behind or I will put you on the floor in a thumb lock faster than you can say "ow."

It's the being around too many people, for too long. I get to where every nerve in my brain is oversensitized and I go straight from, "gee, this is fun, to, MIGRAINE, NOW." So, I try to pace myself. It doesn't always work. Even having Ginger's house to retreat to at the Atlanta F2F didn't help me one day, I still ended up having to take a couple of hours to sleep off a migraine. And that was being with a very small group of people, and not wanting to miss having face time with for even a minute, but the brain just up and said "nope."