That's great! Go you!

I have written 3624 words this month. And that was done in tiny sporadic spurts. But more than zero, so that's progress.

I'm at 4417 because I stalled out when I started working on my D&D Party Project which I am cool with letting happen because this is a thing which is more likely to lead to me making money and my WP feels so solidly rooted in my (for lack of a better word) soul that I feel safe leaving it ...and now that I type this I miss it and need to go write some right now bbl.

I lost another fiction contest, but because it was one of those weird ones you write in a few days to someone else's prompt, don't really think another mag would want. Will make a few good blog posts, though. [link]

Okay, I have an amusing story I've been saving for this crowd of writers.

I have a particularly heinous older relative. We say she's got the personality of a freight train: she will ask you a question, interrupt you to answer it herself, and then get mad at you for your stupid foolishness. She has spent a lot of time trying to make me better than I am with stuff I don't want, like expensive perfume and flouncy skirts.

So she came to visit and was informing me I need to do better with my life. I am "funny" so I need to write a book. I ask what she has in mind.

It's easy! she says. All I have to do is 1. take my book to the publisher, and 2. enjoy the money.

I can't stop laughing. Apparently I don't need to write an outline, do any research, or decide whether my book is steampunk high fantasy, historical fiction or a coffee table book called Recycled Home and Garden. There is no need to find an agent, deal with rejection letters or rewriting or editing or proofing. I can just pull a completed project out of a secret drawer and get on with it right away.

So I was delighted to discover how incredibly easy it is to create a book and get published and get a lot of money. Sadly I am too lazy to do this, but hey: one of you guys might have some luck with this method.

I HAD NO IDEA! Well, now that I know how it's done, expect me on bestseller lists any day now!

;-)

I look forward to reading Recycled Home and Garden in a couple weeks.

Oh, that was super easy. No professional photographer or staging required! I just carried my cell phone around the house randomly taking pictures and waiting for the captions and copy to magically appear!

I'm not sure what the page count will be, of course.

I need to change my process, obviously. I'm doing too many steps!

Yes, in this case, the whole plan seems to be: PROFIT!

Yes, in this case, the whole plan seems to be: PROFIT!

I just cried in my tea as I spit it on the monitor