Harmony: Somebody remembered to pick me up the sweetest unicorn. Guess someone was feeling guilty for standing me up in tenth grade. Brad: What? Had to get her something. She sired me. Peaches: Sire-whipped.

'Beneath You'


The Great Write Way, Act Three: Where's the gun?

A place for Buffistas to discuss, beta and otherwise deal and dish on their non-fan fiction projects.


Burrell - Jul 31, 2008 8:39:59 am PDT #445 of 6681
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!

Allyson, maybe try writing in 3rd person but through Sam's perspective, as if the narrator were trying to ventriloquize Sam's voice.


Allyson - Jul 31, 2008 9:08:02 am PDT #446 of 6681
Wait, is this real-world child support, where the money goes to buy food for the kids, or MRA fantasyland child support where the women just buy Ferraris and cocaine? -Jessica

It's just not working out for me, Burrell. I butchered the first chapter making the effort. I can't make my head switch over.

I'm just doing the narrative. It will sell, or it won't sell. But I'll finish it the way I know how, and try and deal with the fact that it isn't the quality it could be if only I could write it correctly. I know how that sounds, like I'm being defiant to my own detriment.

I also have a writing partner, now. It's working out nicely.


Beverly - Jul 31, 2008 9:18:41 am PDT #447 of 6681
Days shrink and grow cold, sunlight through leaves is my song. Winter is long.

Allyson, essentially you're telling a story to your nephew, and to any other kids who may be reading the story, or having it read to them. It doesn't have to be Sam's voice. You're the storyteller. Your voice is fine.

Quality has nothing to do with POV, it has to do with the story. And you tell wonderful stories. So please stop doubting your own voice and just tell the story.

I'm glad you have a writing partner, if that's helping you.


Allyson - Jul 31, 2008 11:44:12 am PDT #448 of 6681
Wait, is this real-world child support, where the money goes to buy food for the kids, or MRA fantasyland child support where the women just buy Ferraris and cocaine? -Jessica

Just had a really good story meeting, want to go home and write so badly I can taste it. But, need to do more work. A few more hours. Just a few more.


Burrell - Jul 31, 2008 2:26:38 pm PDT #449 of 6681
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!

Oh Allyson, it was only a suggestion, if it doesn't work for you don't stress yourself trying to do it. I have a terrible time trying to write in first person unless I'm actually writing about myself.


Ginger - Jul 31, 2008 2:54:58 pm PDT #450 of 6681
"It didn't taste good. It tasted soooo horrible. It tasted like....a vodka martini." - Matilda

Shelf Space

The new shelves are measured, they're dusted and neat.
They're measured in inches, they're measured in feet.
The movers have measured in boxes and pounds,
But books still pile up in undignified mounds.
They capture the table, they conquer the floor.
They have to be shifted to open the door.
From now on I'll be good, I'll learn to be tough.
A room lined with tall shelves is surely enough.
One birthday, two yard sales, three local book fairs
The books climb off the shelves and head for the stairs.
The other thing that's certain is curious looks,
Followed each time by: "Have you read all these books?"


SailAweigh - Jul 31, 2008 3:39:56 pm PDT #451 of 6681
Nana korobi, ya oki. (Fall down seven times, stand up eight.) ~Yuzuru Hanyu/Japanese proverb

Heheh. That's good, Ginger. Books are kind of like crab grass, invasive and hard to get rid of.


sarameg - Jul 31, 2008 4:05:21 pm PDT #452 of 6681

I think I need to print that out in large font and post it in my entryway.


sarameg - Jul 31, 2008 4:10:16 pm PDT #453 of 6681

(I just shared it with my mom. Cause it describes them too!)


Beverly - Jul 31, 2008 9:55:03 pm PDT #454 of 6681
Days shrink and grow cold, sunlight through leaves is my song. Winter is long.

::Has happy memories of Ginger's books::