Some comments and my own observations made me realize one of the many fixes I need to make are to establish the relationship between two of the races better. My Faran race should be the sort of thing you scare children with while the same is pretty much true in reverse. There are some exceptions in one location in particular where there is an uneasy treaty, but in general I'm not sure the vibe is there.

So many things to work on.

Thoughts on paying for notes? I still have a little Christmas money so it wouldn't be a sacrifice as such... But that would be it so I'd hate to pay to have the guy say he hated it...people have been hating my work for free for years.

I have no idea how useful that is or not. I could look at something, but it wouldn't be quick turnaround at the moment. Not that I'm an expert by any stretch of the imagination.

It's okay...I know you're busy and this is forty pages. Just wondered if anyone here had, essentially, paid for a beta reader.

wanders in to whine

Good God, I hate writing TOCs. Really, really hate. My agent told me that I didn't have to do a full proposal for the 2nd GCS book (no sample chapter), but this TOC is going to kill me. Because I know what I want to write, but turning it into an outline? Not how my brain works.

Jilli, clearly, we need to meet up and I can be your official notetaker/outline wrangler or something. When's it due?

Plei, I'd like to send the proposal off by early next week. But! I just sent the TOC draft to the beta readers (of which you are one, ahem). But yes, having you be my official outline wrangler would be awesome.

I'm still chipping away at 53. At least the next time I work on it I'll get to the reunion which nails down another plot point on the way to the conclusion.

Unfortunately, it looks like I'll need an extra chapter. This will take me to chapter 58 being the last chapter.

I'm at the reunion and ticking off another plot point. I may finish 53 at the point I'm at though, it would be a good stopping point.

Not that I've reached this point I realize just how insane this bit sounds, it sounds like the Jerry Springer show. Hopefully it works better in the story than in the description.

Whitefonted for Beta Readers

She and he were lovers although it was a secret since it's taboo between their races. His sister tried to kill her, but she fled after accidentally killing his sister. Her companion also stole a priceless item of his though she was unaware of that at the time.

Then she finds out she's pregnant. She sends him a message via a third party. Later, the priceless item indicates that her child will be very important to his people.

While they are apart, he ends up engaged to another woman who he has a little history with though the engagement is being sped up mostly for political reasons. His fiance loves him and he has feelings for her though with caveats.

Her message ends up being intercepted by fiance's father and fiance puts two and two together. Eventually bringing her to his city under the false pretense of reunion. Fiance and his mother decide to have her killed but the future child presents a problem. His mother decides they should lock her away until the child is born, then kill her.

She escapes and is recaptured by the right people. He has her brought to her. He's already under a lot of pressure at the moment and the last thing he needs is another complication, and he knows nothing about the circumstances of his sister's death and the stolen item.

How long do you keep your false starts before you admit you're probably not going to work on them anymore? Cause last summer, I had what felt like this awesome idea, you know, but stuff got in the way, and now I'm not sure that it's any good...should I throw it out?