You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both.

Spike ,'Sleeper'


Natter 58: Let's call Venezuela!  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


Kat - May 08, 2008 7:14:16 pm PDT #5795 of 10001
"I keep to a strict diet of ill-advised enthusiasm and heartfelt regret." Leigh Bardugo

There are a couple in culver city, ita. Gimme a sec and I'll get the names for you.


Matt the Bruins fan - May 08, 2008 7:15:23 pm PDT #5796 of 10001
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand

I can see how (for people who love kids), having them would increase general stress and frustration and lower one's general day-to-day happiness while still providing a profound sense of fulfillment and more intense peaks of joy. The author seems to be overlooking the fact that love of various kinds is actually quite effective at making people miserable a substantial portion of the time. But I think most everyone finds the pros worth the cons.


Hil R. - May 08, 2008 7:18:29 pm PDT #5797 of 10001
Sometimes I think I might just move up to Vermont, open a bookstore or a vegan restaurant. Adam Schlesinger, z''l

I definitely want to have kids. I'm currently 27. I'm starting to get worried about fertility, and about when I'm going to have time, and about finding a guy to have the kids with, and all of that stuff. I've got decent genetics on my side -- my mom had her first kid at 30, one grandmother had her first at 30, the other grandmother had her first at 38. But still, worried a bit.


Kat - May 08, 2008 7:19:15 pm PDT #5798 of 10001
"I keep to a strict diet of ill-advised enthusiasm and heartfelt regret." Leigh Bardugo

There is Dainties [link] which is the one that is closest. I've never been. Susiecakes [link] is another one. It was actually pretty tasty. I've heard that Buttercake [link] is meh, but a woman at work swears by it. Bluebird Cafe [link] does more than just cupcakes... their lemon bars are yum.


Strega - May 08, 2008 7:22:30 pm PDT #5799 of 10001

If the guy is just asking about how people feel within the day-to-day effort, he might not be asking the right questions to get at what kids really mean to their parents.

The article is misleading -- he didn't do the study, but there have been at least 3 with very similar results. He talks about them his book, Stumbling On Happiness. Which is an excellent, fun read, btw. It's about why people are so terrible at predicting what will make them happy.

But the studies were about day-to-day (and moment-to-moment) happiness, because memory is extremely unreliable when it comes to how happy, or unhappy, something made you.

Anyway, here's a bit from a essay he wrote for Time about the parenting issue:

Our children give us many things, but an increase in our average daily happiness is probably not among them. Rather than deny that fact, we should celebrate it. Our ability to love beyond all measure those who try our patience and weary our bones is at once our most noble and most human quality.

[link]


§ ita § - May 08, 2008 7:28:31 pm PDT #5800 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

Oh, I am bounteously blessed. I want back on wheat, and stat. Oh, and the energy to actually go to the stores and pick them up.

Speaking of energy, I got enough up to take in my popcorn maker. I forget that sometimes, just sometimes, it's not going to be a frustrating experience (well, not counting the traffic), and Bed Bath and Beyond just let me swap mine right there for a new one.

The resulting popped batch tasted the most cornful of all. It was very delish.

most everyone finds the pros worth the cons.

I would hope so. Although I suspect I'd be miserable now in love or not, I'd hate to think I'd be more miserable now in love.


Burrell - May 08, 2008 8:04:04 pm PDT #5801 of 10001
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!

I was gonna recommend Bluebird, ita. I haven't tried the others. I'm going to make green tea cupcakes with cream cheese frosting for my students tomorrow, but the cupcakes come from a box (TJs) and I haven't tried them before. eh, how bad could they be, right?

Noah is SO CUTE. And egad, when did Matilda turn into a toddler?!

As for kids and happiness, I think it's both. They drive me nuts sometimes, and yet no one else can melt away my bad mood more quickly or more completely. But parenthood isn't necessarily about happiness any more than marriage is, at least for me. They are about loving someone else enough to let their life become intertwined with yours. Sometimes that will be difficult, but it's also wonderful.


Vortex - May 08, 2008 8:33:48 pm PDT #5802 of 10001
"Cry havoc and let slip the boobs of war!" -- Miracleman

Around here is Cakelove, which you may know from Warren Brown on Sugar Rush on Food Network. Aside from the fact that they are expensive, they keep them refrigerated for the buttercream, so after you buy it, you have to wait for it to come to room temp before you can eat it. Annoying.

Well, I suppose you don't have to wait, but I enjoy it a lot more.


Jesse - May 09, 2008 2:50:38 am PDT #5803 of 10001
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

Bobby Flay did a cupcake Throwdown with the woman from this place in LA: [link]


Sue - May 09, 2008 3:40:02 am PDT #5804 of 10001
hip deep in pie

So the shelf above the toilet strikes again. This morning, I accidentally flushed a bottle of Lancome moisturizer. Now, I'm wondering if that will clog, or just float out to sea.