NOT FAIR

I'm just glad jerusalem crickets can't fly.

There was a large dead roach in my work bathroom all afternoon. Better than a large live roach, I guess!

Also, I got a phone call today from a number I didn't recognize, so I didn't answer, and the person didn't leave a message. So of course I googled the number, and found it was a friend of mine calling from work! Luckily, she just sent me an email.

My mother hates the phone too, this is one of the reasons I love Mom. She also hates the computer, but her DH reads my emails to her and types her responses. He's a doll. MIL loves the phone and will say to me a dozen times in the conversation, "oh, I know you don't like the phone," but does she hang up, no.

I love talking on the phone. And I would love texting if I was better at it. I think I need a phone with a qwerty keyboard. I'm so slow at it, it's simply annoying otherwise.

I feel your big ugly bug pain, Dana. I would run screaming when I first moved here. 28 years later I just kill 'em dead with whatever is handy.

I need some investors, quick. I want to start a new magazine that is actually fucking useful to, well, me. Decorating ideas for a studio apartment that won't destroy all hope of getting a security deposit back. Receipts to keep for your taxes.

A goth style/fashion/makeup issue guest edited by Jilli.

Window box flowers/herb gardens for apartment living.

Useful investment/money articles that assume you're a thirty-something who doesn't give a crap if you die single.

Book reviews by Smart Women/Trashy Books. A Tomato Nation advice column. A Dress A Day column from Erin.

How to make the most of your yard sale. Where you can park for free in every major metropolitan city. LUSH product of the month. What sort of groceries you can get on twenty-five bucks that will last the week without making you twenty-five pounds heavier.

A tech column written by women, for women. And I want it on every grocery store checkout stand in the US. Because, SERIOUSLY, magazine just BLOW right now.

Here, here. Can the Buffista teachers take turns writing an education column, too?

Aw, man, Allyson, if I had any money to invest I'd totally invest in your magazine. I'm still mourning the loss of Budget Living, which sounds like a proto-your magazine and folded something like three years ago. I just ran across one of my few remaining copies on a neglected bookshelf this afternoon and got sad all over again. Theme parties for under $150! How to assemble thrift store and Goodwill finds into a neo-Victorian glam bedroom for $25 or less! John Waters raving about the glories of SF's Kayo Books! Redoing your entire kitchen with a yard of gingham rickrack and two paperclips!

It was awesome.

Budget Living was awesome before The Man wrecked it.