Weddings I have attended and what people wore:
My father's second. Took place in our living room. I wore purple with puffed sleeves, but in my excuse I was 12 and it was 1984.
Two in Ohio, mr. flea's work colleagues. Tuxes for boys in wedding parties; girls in floor-length.
Mine: veejane in blue linen (her choice), groom's man in regular suit (his choice).
Friends in Ohio: At the courthouse, in business casual.
Mothers second: groom in a suit, bride in artsy fartsy pink; bride danced down the aisle of an octagonal unitarian church. Rain POURED.
Best friend: Groom and best man in tuxes; bride in wedding dress; MOH in strapless grey silk satin with kick-ass knee-high suede embroidered boots (her choice, natch.)

So, all the weddings I've been to with people I actually know have been non-wedding-industrial complex.

She doesn't know all the bridesmaids. I assume most of them are the bride's friends/relatives.

Yeah. I know the bride and the groom (my brother), obviously, and my sister and her husband are in the wedding party, but I've never met some of these people. I live out of state, so I don't know everyone in their social circle.

I hear you, shrift. I was in an August bridal party in Monroe, MI, and we were all in floor length Vera Wang, and the guys in tuxes. No one thought twice of it.

Yes, in the midwest, that is just the way it is done! Okay, I wouldn't do it that way, but I'm also the person whose extended family will be asking why she's still single this summer, so...

It looks like the DH's movie project is getting very hot again. I can't post names here for fear of messing things up, but I will say the director is the same Oscar winner (for Last Picture Show) who has been involved for a couple of years and they have attached actors, some of which could be named Shmilly-Shmob Schmorton, Shmames Sfranco and also Schmilda Schwinton. He has been working on this for 8 years now and the deal could fall apart like it has a zilliion times before but it looks good right now, so keep your fingers crossed.

"floor length gown" to me says "whee! no hose and no one will be able to see whatever bruises I've given myself lately knocking my shins into the coffee table!"

Floor-length is fun--it REALLY feels like one is dressing up.

It's not like I've reworn the tea length bridesmaids dresses I have any more than the full length ones. Okay, one. I've reworn exactly one bridesmaids dress, that's it.

Okay, I so need a cup of coffee. I thought I could get through today without it, but no way.

Oo, exciting Scrappy!

You know, we really need a good reason to make everyone dress up again. The last time I dressed up was years ago, right after Franny was born.

It's not like I've reworn the tea length bridesmaids dresses I have any more than the full length ones.

Yeah, me too. Although I only have one of each.

My friend who's been a bridesmaid a million times has most often been told to pick her own dress, not a Bridesmaid Dress. So she was cranky when we were in a wedding together in floor-length satin, but I was just thinking how much worse it could have been.

Shmames Sfranco

ooh! love!

I think I"m going to head out early due to the weather. it sounds like almost everyone else has left anyway.

Happy birthday, Jon! And a happy belated one to Benno!

Don't all the men in the wedding party usually wear tuxes?

Or maybe, like Shrift said, I'm used to that as a Midwestern Thing. Tuxes, expensive/useless/ugly/Prom-y bridesmaid dresses.

It's an Italian-American thing too, though I am starting to see a trend towards tuxes with Windsor knots instead of bowties. Floor-length dresses for the women is the norm. Tea-length is passable if everyone is wearing them and they're in a fabric that connotes cocktail/party dress.

I tried to stay away from the ugly Prom-like dresses, and picked something they could wear again. Oooh, related story: My cousin in France (bridesmaid in my wedding 2 years ago) used the dress as her wedding dress for the civil ceremony in July. I was totally chuffed.

Ginger, I think shrift said the color must be Marine.

ita, I hope that all this is over for you soon.