javachik, I wish I could--especially after our lovely visit the other night, it really sounds like a not-remotely-bad place to work and you sound like an incredibly conscientious, kind manager. But it's not manageable unless we invested in a second car; and, of course, if we had enough income to be able to invest in a second car, I never would've been looking for a different job in the first place.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I am hating on myself pretty hard right now. I just wanted to make things better for my family, and it's all come out the complete opposite. Good going, me. Way to be a competent grown-up.

{{JZ}}

it sounds like their "meeting" on Friday was a lame attempt at covering their asses - while

In the exit interview, they said that both executives had had numerous conversations with me about major issues with my work

when put through my GoogleBullshitDescrambler (TM); amazingly comes out as:

my niece was just kicked off campus at her third vocational college and seeing as my sister has compromising photos of me doing offbeat things with a houseplant and the family lizard at last year's Thanksgiving drunkfest, I have to find a place of employment for said niece quick, before sis mails the photos to my wife (again) or (sob) posts them on the *fake* myspace page she built for me after I went tobogganing naked on the innerstate. And no one else will hire my niece, so here we are. sorry - it's not you - it really is me... John Q. Asshat.

ETA: xpost! (and edited to clean up some rage-grammar)

Sox is so right. And so is Bonny: it's nothing you've done, JZ. You're not only competent, but you're an awesome human being who cares tremendously for everyone around her and IS diligent about responsibilities.

Anyone should be thrilled to have you on staff.

So, I know the commute won't work, but check your e-mail.

Distant? Jehosaphat(sp), I can feel your warmth all the way on the other coast...without benefit of ever actually being in thermal distance of you.

Well, yeah, but I'm different in person. I'm shy at the best of times, and walking into a new environment without a lot of clearly stated job expectations (they had nothing but praise for how I met the expectations that were clearly stated), missing my beloved old boss and our father-daughter relationship, and, not incidentally, working on 5-6 hours' broken sleep max a night since September '06, made me really very quiet and shut down.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I am hating on myself pretty hard right now. I just wanted to make things better for my family, and it's all come out the complete opposite. Good going, me. Way to be a competent grown-up.

If you need to do this, JZ, ignore what I am about to say.

If not, listen up. It WILL. NOT. STAND. for you to beat yourself for something that made perfect sense and...eventually, will make even more sense. I'm sure of it. In the meantime. Entitled asswipes are everywhere, sad to say. These entitled asswipes made a mistake that is causing you temporary pain. Temporary.

Unless you are certain that you exhibited willful, incompetant or criminal behavior, this firing HAS to be about something other than you.

Since it seems impossible that you could be, with your finely tuned conscience, any of those things then you have the option to throw yourself down the well, or ass 'em in the ear. I'm voting for the latter.

made me really very quiet and shut down.

So. You are tired. That surely feels bad to you. It woudl feel bad to me, but incompetant, criminal or uncaring? Nope. Still not gonna stand.

made me really very quiet and shut down.

Sorry, but that's also the environment at your new place, bringing that out in you. It's their stupid, stupid mishandling of the entire situation. They had a gem and they didn't have the patience required to see you shine. Fuckers.

Totally not you, JZ. You are a competent (more than competent) grown up. I'm so sorry this happened. {{{JZ}}}

But it's not manageable unless we invested in a second car; and, of course, if we had enough income to be able to invest in a second car, I never would've been looking for a different job in the first place.

You wouldn't happen to be interested in a 1991 Nissan Sentra with almost 160K miles on it, would you?

Also, I could have just said, Sweetie, I am so sorry. Which, besides being indignant on your behalf, is how I feel.

{{{{{JZ}}}}} I have procured a nice bottle of wine, which I will bring over tonight, and then we can weep and rail or distract ourselves with fluffy Mounties. Also, perhaps, food.