Except for the fact that this is a world in which George W. Bush is president of the United States, despite his complete inability to form and speak a single coherent sentence.

I'm talking about getting a good job.

And W is the king of parental privileges/favors.

I feel the need to call my mom and apologize to her for being pissed about having to type her papers.

She was a terrible typist. Wrote everything longhand, and when she tried to type something, it would result in quiet tears as she hunted and pecked at the keyboard.

We were in college at the same time, and it was infuriating to me when she would sheepishly come to me with 20 pages of something written out, that was due in the morning, because she had tried to do it herself and broke at the last minute.

And it was all medical jargon. And I remember feeling at the time, liek it was cheating.

But dude. DUDE. She would have NEVER asked me to write something for her.

The lack of ethics is mindblowing.

And then there's the fact that she's MAJORING IN ENGLISH. It's like adding gasoline to my rage bomb.

People = crazy. Also bad. Possibly fucked up.

Christ, will this day never end??

My mom was my editor for high school papers, just underlining stuff and noting "this makes no sense," or my favorite: "you are bs-ing here." I can't imagine a world in which it was ok for her to rewrite, much less write, a paper for me. How any parent would think it's ok for a COLLEGE SENIOR is really beyond me.

Working with T has made me realize how some lines can be hard to see, but that one? Really, really clear.

Bless my boss, he just told me that if I want to call in sick for my entire last week he'll stand by me.

Of course I won't because, stupid ethics. Just because the uni consistently gave me incomplete information that worked to my disadvantage doesn't mean I should dick over the people I work with and for. But I do anticipate a couple of sudden 12-noon doctor appointments that'll take all afternoon. What are they going to do, fire me?

And then there's the fact that she's MAJORING IN ENGLISH. It's like adding gasoline to my rage bomb.

That, too. And, aside from the major ethical issues...you can't hold your kid's hand forever. I mean, Annabel is 33 years younger than me. If life is kind to us, she will outlive me by many years. She will be healthy and in her prime while I'm aging and slowing down. So she'll need to learn to take care of herself. If she turns out to be less of a writer than I am, I'll be doing her no favors at all by writing her papers for her (though, before college, if she has trouble and needs guidance on grammar or how to structure a paper or whatever I'll do all I can to help her, short of actually doing the work for her). She'll need to learn to get by in the world on her own abilities. You know, be a grown-up, when she grows up.

Sophia, has coworker explained just WTF she was thinking?

I swear, I need to go have a word.

Speaking of education. Monday will be my son's first day of public school.

Either or both would do. What the hell kind of parent thinks this is a good thing to do for your kid?

The English Majors I've known would tear someone like that to shreads without as much as a second thought.