Because I am now earwormed, I had to filk:

He's Mister Gray Christmas, he's Mister Sleet. He's Mr. Wet Boot Sock, he's Mr. Shoot-me-now-please
They call me Wintery-Mix Miser. Whatever I touch, turns to slush in my clutch. I'm too much.

Is there Heat Miser/Snow Miser slash?

Yeah, I could google, but it's more fun to ask here....

You've got to admire their marketing skills, since diamond prices are based on perceived value, rather than rarity.

They arguably had the greatest marketing success in the 20th century, although abetted by a worldwide supply monopoly that kept their theme from being diluted. But yeah, diamonds aren't rare at all.

if I see one more goddamn diamond commercial Ima shoot the TV. DIAMONDS ARE NOT SUBSTITUTES FOR EXPRESSING LOVE.

99% of the time I'm with you, and with erika about the filthy blood-soaked history of the diamond industry, but I must admit that there's one ad that has actually made me want to run out and spend money on a diamond. However, it's a radio ad for Shreve Jewelers that's so aggressively stupidly written that it makes me want to spend an assload of money on someone else's diamonds, then go rub Shreve's nose in the receipt like a bad puppy.

The ad is a long pointless narrative about rekindling the romance of a bygone era through the purchase of diamonds. A glorious time "of hoop skirts and carriage rides through the park, when love symbolized something truly important in a young woman's life." A) The entire ad is like all the worst tropes of ineptly-written Regency romance clumped into 25 soggy seconds, and B) LOVE HAS NEVER SYMBOLIZED ANYTHING IN ALL OF RECORDED HUMAN HISTORY, DUMBSHITS. OTHER THINGS SYMBOLIZE LOVE. Jesus wept!

Is there Heat Miser/Snow Miser slash?

I'm not sure if I am more disturbed by the thought of that in cartoon version, or the Harvey Fiersten/Michael McKean live action version.

They arguably had the greatest marketing success in the 20th century...

Well, in the US at least. And maybe Japan? I know Europe hasn't really bought into the whole diamond engagement ring thing.

I once met someone who had worked in the sorting houses in Amsterdam and he said that it was crazy how the system worked. Value was so subjective that stones were sorted depending on where they were going, like, the US market values these characteristics so we'll send them these kinds of diamonds, Japan values this, so we'll send them these, etc.

Value was so subjective that stones were sorted depending on where they were going, like, the US market values these characteristics so we'll send them these kinds of diamonds, Japan values this, so we'll send them these, etc.

See, to me, this sounds like the sanest part of the whole hoop-de-hoodle.

See, to me, this sounds like the sanest part of the whole hoop-de-hoodle.

Yes, but people here seem to think that they are buying something with an objective value (as long as they follow the 4Cs and such).

ETA: Here being the US and not b.org

Hm, I bought a cookie to eat tonight before my class. However, I want it now. What to do?

(What would DeBeers Do?)

(now I keep seeing DeBeers as DeBarge)

What would DeBeers Do?

Convince someone else that the cookie is worth $1000, you sell it, then you use the money to start a cookie-baking sweatshop, and have all the cookies that you want.