I gave her everything... jewels, beautiful dresses -- with beautiful girls in them.

Spike ,'Sleeper'


Spike's Bitches 38: Well, This Is Just...Neat.  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


vw bug - Dec 17, 2007 7:59:42 am PST #8689 of 10002
Mostly lurking...

I think they're getting the nighttime thing figured out...it's during the day that seems to be giving them trouble. He doesn't like to be set down at all, so my SIL holds him all day. Then when my brother comes home, he holds the baby till bedtime.

And I'm totally clueless about these things, so I just keep my mouth shut, which then seems to frustrate my brother, because he seems to think I'm judging them or something, which I'm not. I just don't know what to say. So, I want to be supportive in a knowledgeable way, I guess. I did end up suggesting that they get a sling, and I'm actually considering trying to make one for them, but I don't really have the time, so...

I'm mostly worried, because my SIL is supposed to go back to work full time in January, but she works out of her home and won't have help with the baby...if she's not able to get anything done now, I don't see that much is going to change in two weeks.


P.M. Marc - Dec 17, 2007 8:01:26 am PST #8690 of 10002
So come, my friends, be not afraid/We are so lightly here/It is in love that we are made; In love we disappear

PMM, did you have a sling that you really used/liked?

I had a sling, but she hated the sling, and slings and what were at the time G/H cups don't mix. (Even at my more mellow DDD, I think they still don't mix.) Mostly, we either carried her or used the Bjorn. I got some use from the mei tai carrier, and some from the Ergo (that I still have to put in the mail for the next person! I haven't forgotten! I just, umm, haven't been out to the post office), but mostly carrying.


Fay - Dec 17, 2007 8:03:30 am PST #8691 of 10002
"Fuck Western ideologically-motivated gender identification!" Sulu gasped, and came.

Apparently I cried every time my parents put me down. For the first two years. They used to put me in the car seat and go for a drive to get me to fall asleep, then stealthily carry sleeping Wee!Me back and stealthily lay me on the bed and stealthily tiptoe out of the room. At which point I would wake up and wail like a bereft thing.

God, my poor parents.


P.M. Marc - Dec 17, 2007 8:03:51 am PST #8692 of 10002
So come, my friends, be not afraid/We are so lightly here/It is in love that we are made; In love we disappear

I'm mostly worried, because my SIL is supposed to go back to work full time in January, but she works out of her home and won't have help with the baby...if she's not able to get anything done now, I don't see that much is going to change in two weeks.

It was *really* next to impossible to work from home with Lillian as a baby. She also didn't like to be out of arms, and it was hard to type around her.

A New Native carrier (which is a ringless sling) might work for them.


vw bug - Dec 17, 2007 8:09:10 am PST #8693 of 10002
Mostly lurking...

A New Native carrier (which is a ringless sling) might work for them.

Cool. I'll take a look at those. They've been pointed away from anything like Bjorn and whatnot until the little guy's six months old.


WindSparrow - Dec 17, 2007 8:12:14 am PST #8694 of 10002
Love is stronger than death and harder than sorrow. Those who practice it are fierce like the light of stars traveling eons to pierce the night.

This site [link] has a simple design of a wrap that can be used to hold babies of all ages, in a number of handy configurations. You might be able to make one for them, vw. Well, I know you could do it, what is not certain is whether it would help them at all.


P.M. Marc - Dec 17, 2007 8:14:13 am PST #8695 of 10002
So come, my friends, be not afraid/We are so lightly here/It is in love that we are made; In love we disappear

Cool. I'll take a look at those. They've been pointed away from anything like Bjorn and whatnot until the little guy's six months old.

That's just weird. Why have they been pointed away from the Bjorn? I know some sling sellers claim that it's not ideal, but I haven't seen any real data that backs those claims up (though the Ergo = WAY more comfortable for me). Jess and Fone Bone use one for Little D, and he seems pretty happy in it. Lillian started in the Bjorn at about 3-4 months.


vw bug - Dec 17, 2007 8:14:41 am PST #8696 of 10002
Mostly lurking...

Yeah, they do look pretty easy to make.


Laura - Dec 17, 2007 8:15:39 am PST #8697 of 10002
Our wings are not tired.

At what age did you start letting your babies cry a bit without picking them up right away?

Apparently 35 or something. I always picked them up right away. It was easier on all of us that way. They stopped the crying thing on their own.


megan walker - Dec 17, 2007 8:15:51 am PST #8698 of 10002
"What kind of magical sunshine and lollipop world do you live in? Because you need to be medicated."-SFist

And I'm totally clueless about these things, so I just keep my mouth shut, which then seems to frustrate my brother, because he seems to think I'm judging them or something, which I'm not. I just don't know what to say. So, I want to be supportive in a knowledgeable way, I guess.

Honestly, as a former nanny who has seen a number of new parents with kids, I don't think there is much you can do since it seems that they have both already made the choice that they prefer holding to crying. In my experience, there is usually one parent who forces the issue but that doesn't seem to be the case here.