Panicky new-job question: The accounting people at the new job just ran the numbers on my new salary with the various withholdings and insurance and whatnot. Hec is currently temping and EM is not working, which means that for the time being I need to carry both Hec and Emmett on my insurance. And, with all that, even with the 5K/year increase, my net will be $350 less per month than I'm making now.

So now what do I do? We can't survive on that. I mean, there'll be regular reviews and raises, but my original misgivings about the increase being smaller than I'd hoped for and ultimately problematic were dead on.

My whole building just shook!

Turns out ConEd blew another manhole cover.

Between the car fire last week and the nerve gas a few weeks ago and the steam pipe at Grand Central a few weeks before that...

How do you feel about the job itself, JZ? Insurance is crazy expensive, as is child care, and living. But the first thing you need to consider is how you feel about the job and the people, because work takes up so much of our lives. If you feel good about the job and the coworkers then the money issues will work out somehow. If you aren't that crazy about the job then the $ becomes a much bigger deal.

w00t

oh great. so now you can put numbers in and still call it a word.

JZ, how long until the "regular review"? Of course, I don't really know your situation, but if it's 2-3 months, can you survive? What if it's 6-9? Any chance you can fiddle with the withholding to get a bit more now? Also, is the insurance more by adding Emmett? I'm just asking because I know in many situations it's self or family, but size of family doesn't matter.

Could EM kick in a little to help cover Emmett? Every little bit helps...

I do feel good about the job and the people I'll be working for (co-workers? no idea, haven't met them yet). But we're about to get hit with a $200/m increase in day care.

I think I'm going to have to tell them that I know I've already signed the agreement and my start date is in four days, but I'm going to have to withdraw unless they can offer me enough to at least match my current net.

Fuckity.

eta:

Could EM kick in a little to help cover Emmett?

Nope. She's got nothing right now. P/T work with no insurance, outside help to cover the rest of her expenses, nothing extra at all. Hec and I have been figuring that we'll probably have to budget a bit in every month to support her until she gets another job.

If the review is in 4 months and there's a chance at a further increase then, we could probably tough it out. If it's six months to a year, I don't know how we can manage. How should I word this email?

JZ, do you still have the possibility of getting another, better paying job at your old place? I have no advice, but best of luck to all of you.

Damn, the snow is coming down fast outside. I just went to rescue TCG's Christmas presents from the car, and there is already several inches on the ground.

IOweirdN, I apparently have been given a free subscription to a bridal magazine with one of my registries. Someone please come and take the crazy bridal magazine away from me.

JZ, do you still have the possibility of getting another, better paying job at your old place?

There's always the possibility. Just no certainty as to exactly when or even definitely if. At this point I've proven that I have no talent or patience for accounting-type jobs, and senior administrative/executive assistant jobs come vacant very very rarely here.

Though everyone's made it clear that I am welcome to stay here at this job for as long as I want, so I could just dig in my heels and stay put until something better comes along; I just don't know when or if that would be.

And I do really like and admire the individual I'd be supporting at the new company, and it sounds creative and interesting and like a big stretch in a good way. I'm just not in a place where I can take a pay cut. Certainly not a pay cut that comes with a doubled to tripled commute, as this one would.

{{{JZ}}}

TCG has been told he can go home now, except he thinks the roads are too bad and very busy, so he is going to wait a couple of hours.