Ryan’s hair is extra spikey tonight. Is that a plaid silver suit? Oh, Ryan. You’re like the worst closet gay ever.

Mimi! Dressed like slutty Sandy from Grease.

David Archuleta – When You Believe

He’s sooo cute. What is he wearing and why doesn’t it match what he’s singing at all? Really? Cartoon ballad from the Moses movie? Please, please sing an up tempo song. You have a beautiful voice and it was beautiful. Just one fast song, though, please, before the end.

Sidebar: Thus spake my friend, a complete Idol virgin, who’s watching with me tonight: “He has a pretty voice, but he’s really boring.” True. True.

Carly Smithson – I Can’t Live (If Livin’ Is Without You)

Ok, this is NOT a Mariah song. Yes, she covered it. But so did twenty-leven million other people. Cheater, cheater song repeater. She is really straining on those big belt-y notes. Y’all, I think, much like Ramiele, she actually doesn’t have a big, belt-y diva voice. Randy’s right. She did kinda slide into the pitch there at the beginning. Wow, that was actually very cogent criticism. Well, one good point, she looks the best she’s ever looked on the show. Ever.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: Well, actually she didn’t say anything. Halfway through the song she got up and went to the kitchen to go order us some take out burgers and then she went to check on what her cat was doing. (Peeing in the litter box, for all those interested).

Syesha Mercado – Vanishing

I love this song. When I was 19, I totally wanted this song to be sung at my funeral. Also, why are you dressed as a disco queen singing a song about someone dying and you losing them and missing them so much. But, wow, she’s really singing it well. And that last little bit. Even Mariah doesn’t do it better. That’s the best she’s done in weeks.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: “She has a church voice. Brava, young one. Brava. She’s done well.”

We were also impressed with Paula’s critique. Very lucid and a good comeback to Simon.

tiggy! Are you watching?! I was thinking about you the whole time David Cook was on!

So we took a break to eat yummy turkey burgers and garlic fries and now we're back.

Why is Brooke dressed like a 70’s disco queen?

Brooke White – Hero

Love how Mariah was like, “You should do X. Oh, that’s what you were doing . . . you were doing that? Oh, ok.” Well, she was completely of pitch there at the beginning. Kinda got it back there and then on the bridge, oh and then . . . lost it again completely. Oh my goodness, y’all. She is shaking like a leaf. That close up. She looks terrified through the whole thing. What has happened to our Little Miss Sunshine? Agreed with Randy again.

Thus spake the Idol Virgin: “What is this? Why can’t she sing? Oh, she’s shaking. That’s sad.” Harsh.

Kristy Lee Cook – I Don't Wanna Cry

Mariah lies just as much as Paula. Ok, the beginning is way too low for her already suspect lower register. She’s starting to pull it out once she gets to the chorus. Trying to country it out, but as soon as she gets back to the verse it’s right back to being in the wrong key. WTF, Kristy Lee? Why not just transpose the lyrics into the right key? The choruses will save her, because the verses sucked tremendous amounts of ass.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: In the bathroom. Left after the first couple of note of the first verse. She came out when Randy was praising the end and said “Don’t lie, Randy.” True, true.

David Cook – Always Be My Baby

I’ve already said all that I’ll ever have to say about D. Cook, so I’ll let my Idol Virgin take it away. “I don’t mind the rearrangement. I’m more offended by the fact that he can’t sing. Has he even hit one note?” And the answer to that was, as usual, no. Do I have to say how much I hated this? Let’s move along

Jason Castro – I Don't Wanna Cry

Idol virgin says he’s yummy and beautiful. I heartily concur. I enjoy what he did with the song, although his voice has sounded better. And great googly moogly, he’s pretty. This was actually a good song choice for him. And he managed to turn it into his usual kaffe klatsch joint.

Overall, I thought the singing was actually really good tonight. Best of the night by far for me was actually Syesha. I KNOW! Aside from D. Cook who is always bringing up the rear, worst of the night was Carly (with Brooke not far behind - poor duckling!). Kristy was forgettable. David was boringly brilliant. Jason was same as it ever was. Big take away from the night - Syesha really can sing.

I found them all forgettable. I'm afraid I'm getting bored with Idol.

Amy, i'm just now getting to watch! also got your comment and mostly i'm undecided as of yet, but profile addy is good!

I didn't necessarily love anyone tonight, but come on! it's all Mariah, all the time! what could they really do with this? DCook continues to tug at my heartstrings though. did you know his brother Adam was in the audience tonight? over $40000 in donations were raised to fly him and his wife out to LA so they could see him perform before Adam loses his battle with cancer. i think that is contributing to how emotional David was tonight.

Yeah, after our break, I actually had to look up the song list to remind myself what Jason and Kristy actually sang. It's just, they're all so predictable this season. Every single D'Archie performance (with the exception of the Stevie train wreck) has been a carbon copy of his performance this week. Brooke and Jason always sound like the fifth track on the Starbucks CD, no matter what the genre or what song they are singing. D. Cook always takes his songs to the emo nightmare place. And Syesha and Carly are gonna go all belt-y diva. I mean, every season, the kids have their boxes, but I remember greater diversity in seasons past.

And the kids continue to be absolutely charm free.

Last season Blake had his beatbox, Sanjaya had his hair. We've got no idionsyncracies, no eccentricities, no personality! Ugh. We can haz doodoo over?

I wish I hadn't watched AI tonight. They kept talking about Mariah's more "obscure" songs and how "most people" wouldn't be familiar with them and, dammit, I knew all those fucking songs.

I'm left with the disturbing realization that I know WAY more Mariah Carey music than I'm comfortable knowing.

well, her first album is amazing, and a lot of kids today don't know it other than Vision of Love. Of course, it came out in the early 90's, when most of them were zygotes.