I SWEAR, all I need is a stun gun and the authority to write out fines and NYC will be making CASH money and the subways will be a hell of a lot more pleasant.

They should film this and show it every Christmas!

And I've noticed a lot of times I'll sit next to a man who's taking up part of the seat next to him - a majority of the time he won't move back into his seat area so I can have all of my seat.

Get on your cell phone and pretend to be calling the doctor, and ask, "I just need to know if I'm still contagious, please have him call me ASAP."

Oh, my god, the legs. CLOSE YOUR DAMN LEGS.

Oh lord yes. I'm sure your junk is lovely, really... and simply ENORMOUS. We all appreciate that fact. Now could you let two other people sit? The train is crowded and you are pissing us off.

Somehow, when the old Italian men in my neighborhood flirt with me and beg for a smile, I don't mind. I find it charming, in fact. Which is odd, because I will cheerfully murderize anyone else who tells me to smile.

The elderly hispanic men in my old neighborhood, sitting in a pack and trying to out-do each other in complimenting women as we walked by... it even verged on the lewd occasionally (I knew more Spanish than they thought) and I adored it.

Don't make me google up elephantitis pictures.

I said not THAT many! If a guy has an owie face on, I might give him some leeway.

In the vast majority of the cases I see, the man could easily move to stay within his seat. And I've noticed a lot of times I'll sit next to a man who's taking up part of the seat next to him - a majority of the time he won't move back into his seat area so I can have all of my seat.

Yep. I fully support the need to have some room around the package, but the entire damn bench is asking overmuch. Cynthia Heimel (who's come up once before today) had a piece on this, and she said she did a little experiment at a party: she crossed through a crowded room twice, and she said that a vast majority of the women noticed she was coming and shifted themselves to allow her to pass. The vast majority of the men didn't notice her coming, even when she asked them to move.

This is making me think about why people who know me online first always expect me to take up more meatspace than I physically do.

I call people rude and tacky in full voice all the effin time on the subway. I also say "excuse me" and "could you move over" as I roll my eyes and then sit or put mac into the seat they were blocking.

Unsurprisingly, anyone I do not know on the street who tries to talk to me or about me...I hate those people.

our genitalia get squished between our legs

God bless skirts and drafts. Men need to wear more skirts.

The thing I don't understand is the people who won't get up/MOVE THEIR PACKAGES when a disabled or elderly person comes on board. Especially school kids!. Sometimes I yell at them. I suspect that my city, because it is a small one with bad public transportation, has a larger proportion of disabled people riding the bus, and it drives me bugfuck when people won't move out of the wheelchair area! I am guilty of sometimes putting my bag in my seat to avoid certain rather more unsavory bus patrons city next to me, such as the conspiracy theorist who has rid himself of his computer because he thinks the government is trying to entrap him into looking at kiddie porn and that jet engine exhaust is being laced with anti-depressants and spayed on cities.

The thing I don't understand is the people who won't get up/MOVE THEIR PACKAGES when a disabled or elderly person comes on board. Especially school kids!. Sometimes I yell at them.

When I've been on crutches, I've been surprised at how often people wouldn't get up to let me sit in handicapped seats. I just got used to asking people to move when I needed the seat....