I wish I'd heard that as a kid.

It's right up there with Of Course You Can Turn Him Into A Frog, Let's Go To The Library And Find The Right Book.

You Will Rule The World One Day and Here Kiddo, Let Me Help You Design A Death Ray?

Of Course You Can Turn Him Into A Frog, Let's Go To The Library And Find The Right Book.

Other favorites include:

Here's How You Kill A Bully With Your Bare Hands

Let's Shop for Swords!

If They're Not Useful To You, They Are Cannon-Fodder

Programming Giant Robot Armies of Death

Zombies: Not Just For Doing the Dishes

Actually, I should point out that Emmett brought up his MLB career himself. He was petting Matilda's head and pondering her little face reflectively, and then out of the blue he said, "Wow, when she's like, fourteen, I'll be playing on a Major League Baseball team."

"You're that sure?" I said.

"Of course," Emmett said. "I have the drive and the ambition and it will happen. I know it."

Possibly I'll look at the Robot Chicken C&H this evening... my issues mostly circle around "Please don't write sexy (het or slashy, I don't care which) fic about my childhood woobies, or I will cut you." Dark I can do.

"Of course," Emmett said. "I have the drive and the ambition and it will happen. I know it."

Are you sure he's not Dwight Schrute?

Shiraz on my monitor, Dana.

Heaps of ~ma, Tom. Steph said everything I was going to. It IS worth it, and you CAN do it. And you are worth it.

I got ambitious with my workout since my back didn't hurt anymore after swimming, so I decided to lie down on the floor and do leg lifts and situps. Then I couldn't get off the floor without serious maneuvering since I had managed to fuck up my lower back again.

Speaking as a person with low-back pain experience, don't do that. (I'm real fucking helpful, aren't I?) How are you doing them? With leg lifts, you need to have the other leg bent and tighten your lower pelvic muscles to support your back. Press your lower back inito the floor. (Or bed. My PT told me to do them on the bed, since I have a firm mattress.) And arms at your sides for more support, not behind your head. Sit-ups, just don't. Do crunches and pelvic tilts. ... Of course, you may know all this already. In which case, never mind.

Retrocausality blows peoples' minds because they insist on thinking that time moves.

I want a Coco-Cola in a can. Preferably one with more than scant traces of coke in it.

Happy Pi Day! In celebration, I have cherry pie!

(It's also Steak And Blowjob Day.)

Well, I just had steak. ::looks around for the other half.::

Dana, Ben-Gay will stop the itches too. Same overriding-the-pain-receptors idea. (Don't use on open wounds, natch.) I did this when I was having the mysterious sourceless itch from hell.

This is a fairly dark Calvin and Hobbs comic: Wow. That made me inexplicably sad.

Very sad.

FWIW, Watterson said that there were certain strips which indicated that Hobbes did indeed have his own reality separate from Calvin's imaginings. I don't know which ones he's referring to, but in his estimation Hobbes was not simply the product of Calvin's perfervid brain.

I remember thinking that. Sometimes Calvin reached things by standing on Hobbes that he couldn't have reached if Hobbes were just a stuffed toy. My friend Melisa opined that Hobbes was actually a faery creature sent to keep Calvin from accidentally killing himself.

I had to go to Wikipedia to find out who Dwight Schrute is, and now... he could be.

Dwight is a pop culture and sci-fi buff who has expressed fanship of Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Smallville, The Apprentice, and Lost, as well as an apparent obsession with Battlestar Galactica. His all-time favorite film, out of the "over 240" he has seen, is The Crow. Dwight also hints at being afraid of androids taking over the world.

Except for The Apprentice and Lost, there's nothing here that couldn't reasonably apply to Emmett.

Dwight seems to have an admiration for TV and movie villains, such as Lex Luthor and Anakin Skywalker.

Dear God, Emmett really is Dwight.

Dwight firmly believes that the only thing that separates humans from animals is rules. Dwight's rigid adherence to rules irritates others at times, such as his immediate need to noisily shred documents and credit cards.

On the other hand, Emmett is quite proud of being a monkey boy and half dog, and generally casts a cold eye upon the entire concept of rules. And he'd never shred so sacred an object as a credit card. They're magic!

Verdict: Jury still out. According to Wikipedia, definitive analysis will be possible once we find out Emmett's attitude toward Count Chocula and women named Angela.

People who have made Nutty's no knead bread or similar--what are the advantages? Is the flavour better than other breads you have made?

If They're Not Useful To You, They Are Cannon-Fodder

I've never made other yeast bread, but I really like the sourness of the no-knead recipe.

I really hope Emmett is not actually Dwight Schrute.

I just painted my nails little-girl pink, in preparation for a manicure some time in the next week or so -- I have a gift cert, but I'm such a biter, it's embarassing to get a mani. So I'm going to try to grow them again.