xkcd, how are you so awesome? Washington’s Farewell Address Translated into Everyday Speech:
Sup.
Elections are coming up, and it’s time to figure out who we wanna give the keys to. I figure it might clear things up if I take a sec to explain why I’m not running.
Now, I care about the future, don’t get me wrong, and thanks for your trust so far. I just think me quitting is a good idea on all counts.
I’ve been president twice now, and I didn’t want to do it either time. I tried to quit the first time, but the country was in trouble and every single person around me begged me to stay on.
I’m glad to say we’re pretty much in the clear now and I can get out of here without getting screamed at or letting things fall apart completely.
I told you when I started what I thought of the job. All I’m gonna say is that I did my best to set up the government right, but the more I do this the more I realize how dumb I am, and so maybe it’s okay if I let someone else take over.
It's startling how prescient Washington was.
Laura, you may not be able to drive him in your jammies, but you could drive him in your gym clothes, which is almost as good.
I was really pulling for the guy to be cured. It's a miracle!!
I now have Delsym. Which I didn't last night.
And man, I am a whiny sick person.
Cold with added puking? You deserve to be whiny!
I took Benadryl last night, and wow, actually getting 6 or 7 hours of sleep in a row, like, heals your body and stuff!
Of course, as soon aas I got the Delsym on board, but before it had time to kick in, what happens? A coughing fit. In the office. That was fun!
sarameg, don't take this the wrong way, but why not use a couple of sick days up? Instead of driving yourself to perform, let your body rest up, because this has to be extending your illness, seriously.
::frets::
I agree with Theodosia, sarameg. I mean, unless you don't have sick days, in which case I will shut up.
Also, people are already shouting at me in ASSCAP e-mails because they sent me the wrong information to process, and why can't I be psychic?
I'm going to need more coffee.
