I'm actually trying to make an appointment with... a hand guy. My GP won't give me a new splint, because he wants me to see a specialist. I didn't give him the argument that came first to mind...that it's like giving a drug addict clean needles. I don't want to see a specialist so help me with the lesser of the evils.

Hand specialist can't see me for two weeks anyway. So much for that.

I need PB&J.

I love the intelligent doors in THGttG: "Thank you for making a simple door very happy."

Maybe Hec's coffee thingie is thanking him for making it happy.

Just as long as we don't start getting the existential elevators.

Thank you for making use of this machine, otherwise this machine's life will be meaningless?

Thanking doesn't bother me; first person singular pronouns by machines REALLY BUG. Citibank, your ATMS are the worst abuser in this category. It goes along with their idiotic campaigns where they thank you for treating them like shit. You're a big bank, act like it!

Maybe Hec's coffee thingie is thanking him for making it happy.

It has a telos - making coffee. So I have satisfied its purpose.

I always thought that the simplest way to program smart robots was to give them a pleasure feedback loop for doing their job. Like your roomba is running around your living room with a hard-on, and Japanese factory robots are in a constant state of ecstasy.

Which I appreciate, but the LCD readout which tracks the process finishes with "End of Cycle - Thank you!"

Maybe it's a Sirius Cybernetics Corporation Nutrimatic Machine.

Genuine People Personalities!

The cat has her knickers in a twist because you're anthropomorphizing coffee makers.

UKistas, stay inside!!

Holy crap I just talked to my brother, he's near Leeds and he said they are getting 90 mph winds! YIKES!! Stay safe UKistas!

He also laughed at me because I was complaining about how cold it is here in LA - I mean this morning there was frost ON the dock. Brrrr!

My boss is Super-Agreeable and Keep Client Happy Man. Which sucks, because next week he wants me to go see all my clients and tell them I'm leaving and who's taking over for me.

Doesn't he know I have important things to do like have farewell lunches, bitch about the company, and clean out my office? (Also probably work on this report which is never going to be ready in time omg.)

Holy crap I just talked to my brother, he's near Leeds and he said they are getting 90 mph winds! YIKES!! Stay safe UKistas!

True story: When I was at work today, I could hear very loud laughter from the other side of the office. I went to investigate, and it was about 40 people who had abandoned their work, and were stood laughing at people getting BLOWN OVER outside. And I mean, they were literally hanging on to lamp posts. And falling on the floor. And bouncing down the street. I work right by the River Mersey, so it's great air flow between one bit of the building.

Anyway, what did I do? I joined and started laughing. It was, to be honest, hilarious. But then I saw a woman with a pram and I went back to my desk and tried to ignore the world.

A drain pipe came through the roof (glass) of the building. I left the office at 4pm today, and it took me 2 hours to get home. Buses, all full. Trains, cancelled. I eventually got to the hospital, and queued in their taxi rank to get home. That cost me karma points. I got home and my current flat building is cornered off with red tape, as the concrete tiles on the roof have been falling off to the ground below. I dunno if they have hit anybody.