Again, if he refused to perform the procedure, I'd think he was wrong, but why is it harmful to make sure the patient has thought it all through, particularly when it's an elective procedure?
Providing the information isn't harmful, but I got the distinct impression he tried his best to talk her out of a perfectly reasonable procedure and was disappointed that she stuck to her guns. Or what Steph said more effectively:
But instead he kept asking the patient questions -- "What about this? Well, what about THIS? But WHAT ABOUT THIS?!?" as if the patient hadn't fully considered her decision in an adult fashion, and needed to be reminded of all the ways her decision could destroy her life. That, in my opinion, is overbearing and paternalistic and condescending.
I'm thinking that instead of taking up Precious Column Inches, the Doc could've just said "You'll shoot your eye out, kid!" and conveyed exactly the same amount of respect for his patient's decisions.
I think part of the reason he comes off as such a prig is he's very dismissive of what
she
has to say. He sums it up as:
a patient of mine in her early 20s who was expecting her third child asked to have her tubes tied. A mother of two, with a full-time job and part-time school classes, she saw a fourth child as an impossible burden.
Which is practical and reasonable and, yeah rich-guy (or at least stably employed and educated guy), fairly impossible.
He says nothing about why she is concerned with other birth control methods. He just launches into new husbands and dead kids in house fires (which
he
sees as practical and reasonable arugments... not all wacky and emotional like
seeing a fourth child as an impossible burden.)
Is that how it happened? Was it a dismissive lecture? Don't know, but that's how opted to portray it.
Yeah, ass.
I'm thinking that instead of taking up Precious Column Inches, the Doc could've just said "You'll shoot your eye out, kid!" and conveyed exactly the same amount of respect for his patient's decisions.
"Tubal ligation is always fun until someone loses an eye."
In other news, how the fuck is this day not over yet? I swear I've been here 100 hours. And yet? Not even 4 o'clock.
Oh, and "I hope it gives her a feeling of control in her life". Gosh, how big of him. Wonder what the odds of effective birth
control
giving a feeling of
control
are.
Ass.
how many of us always made smart decisions in our early twenties?
I had a tubal ligation at the same time as I gave birth to my second child at the age of 24. I've never regretted it or thought it wasn't a smart decision on my part.
In fact I was very fortunate in my doctor. I was no longer in the Navy when I had my second child and my doctor was a civilian. He had no problem giving me the tubal ligation. The Navy? No way Jose, not under the age of 30 with children, never if unmarried or married w/o children.
I've never regretted it or thought it wasn't a smart decision on my part.
I'm glad that it worked out that way for you and that you didn't have any problem getting it done and that it was the right decision for you. And I'm am positive that for other women in that age range that making the same decision was the right thing for them to do.
My point there was that in reference to him bringing the things up that he did, maybe he did because very often people in their early twenties make rash or impulsive decisions that they regret later on.
My point there was that in reference to him bringing the things up that he did, maybe he did because very often people in their early twenties make rash or impulsive decisions that they regret later on.
I still think that he questioned his patient the way a parent would question a child, rather than offering a statement or two about how reversing it in the future could have a lot of difficulties.
Kid: "I wanna spend my whole allowance on cannnnnndy!!!!"
Parent: "You might want to use some of the money to buy a new Battlebot later."
Kid: "Candy! Candy!"
Parent: "What if the toy store has the GI Joe with kung-fu grip? Do you think you might want it? You'd have to save some money for it."
Kid: "I. Want. CANDY!!!!"
Parent: "What if we're at Wal-Mart and you see a video game you want? Then you'll be sorry that you spent all your money on candy."
Kid: "Candy! I'll cut you, I swear. CANDY!!!!"
