I don't remember if we shattered her faith in humanity or not.

See, if you wandered past me in the street caroling that would be fine, 'cause you'd just be singing. But when someone mentions carollers at work, for some reason I picture coworkers in holiday-themed sweaters singing badly and with a manic, faux cheer

Think about "Santa Claus is Coming to Town."

Hang your stockings and say your prayers
'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight.

That's a horror movie.

Waiting for the follow-up stories:

Oh, I'd be very surprised if at least some of those hadn't already been covered.

Top conservative news site says soy products make you gay

Huh. There are a lot of soybean growers in some very red areas of the midwest. The wing-nuts are eating their own. So to speak.

Also, bizarre mixing of Christmas imagery makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. Example: at my bank the other day, the tellers all had Christmas cards out at their windows, presumably given to them by customers. My favorite showed a drawing of an ark, afloat on the sea, with pairs of various animals sticking their heads out of windows or standing on deck. There were of course the pairs you usually see -- a pair of lions, a pair of monkeys, a pair of giraffes, a pair of zebras.

But instead of Noah captaining the ship, right there on deck, in the middle of all the animals, for NO GOOD REASON AT ALL, was, in fact, SANTA CLAUS!

That's right. St. Nick himself, in his Coca-Cola red suit, complete with hat.

Just thinking about it sends me into spasms of giggles.

Soy is feminizing, and commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality. That's why most of the medical (not socio-spiritual) blame for today's rise in homosexuality must fall upon the rise in soy formula and other soy products.

Colbert will have fun with this one.

News Flash!

TV Watching Linked to Increased Physical Inactivity

Someone at my former university got paid to do that research. I'm in the wrong line of business.

Wouldn't the feminizing effect as induced by estrogen-heavy foodstuffs be more along the lines of higher voices, thinner beards, and a lowered sex-drive in general rather than an alteration of men's sexual orientation?

Well, since estrogen is a girly thing, then all gay men must have higher counts of estrogren because all gay men are girly poofters. Duh.

I especially liked how they used "estrogens." Hey, they looked it up on the Internets!

Um, who tells scary ghost stories at Christmas?

You've ... okay, not MET, but you've heard of my father. "Who tells scary ghost stories at Christmas?" shouldn't even be a question.