Well, damn. I think I'm going to have to hit an after hours clinic relatively soon today. Unless, that is, anyone here has any medical advice...

I basically feel fine - except for tenderness along the entire left side of my neck. The lymph nodes have been swollen for more than a week and this morning I no longer even have a jawline on that side. I can't imagine that's a good thing. I'd wait until Monday but it feels like I'm beginning to have slight difficulty swallowing.

My lymph nodes swell at any sign of infection, so I'm relatively used to that, but I've never experienced this type of extreme swelling. I don't have a fever, though (98.1 - go team low body temp), so I'm hesitant to think this is caused by a virus.

If anyone has experienced this, believe me, I'm more than happy to wait it out if it'll improve on its own. I'll go jump in the shower now though, just in case the only advice is Go To The Doctor.

Signed,

Hate going to the doctor.

I was at the quilt store at 6 a.m.

Sounds like a better place and more conducive to a timely nap.

I am thinking bad virus that then left the frelling door open for an opportunistic infection or two that have now moved in as squatters. Yes, that is my bitter voice, but it is one of experience. Sadly, that voice is also going to recommend that you see a doctor and let them tell you the same thing. Might need antib's and the amount of swelling you are describing also concerns me. Sorry, to the doctor it is...

Morning, all! I have pinkeye! Argh.

And my net goes in and out like one of those crxy power-drill dildos I saw on an episode of "Real Sex" which scarred me for life. WHO NEEDS A POWER DRILL DICK?! IT IS BIZARRE AND SCARY.

Ahem. Sorry. That ep still makes me go AROO?

HAPPPPPPY BIRTHDAY, JILLI!!! I reffed you in my classes this week -- I"m teaching "Elements of the Gothic Novel" (Haunting of Hill House) and my kids were all like "But Gothic means those kids in black! Right?" and I explained the different permutations of the word gothic, and some of my students were like "What's with the Goths who are all cheerful and perky?" and I went off into this whole perkygoth "Lemme tell you about this chick I know..." and pretty soon I trailed off and there were crickets and my kids had that "Wow we knew she was a craxy guera, but she's totally loca" look and I went back to explaining foreshadowing.

But I thought of you!!!

Tep, I would hate the whole "perfect ex-GF weekend." I would be crazy and stupid and irritable and would try to think positive thoughts, but would end up drinking too much and wearing a slutty top just to show that she may be perfect, but I have BETTER TITS, DAMMIT.

And then I would probably fall down in front of her, and then I would have to kill everyone who saw it.

all things considered, you'll carry this weekend off better than I would. *sigh*

In summation, try not to fall down. Everything besides that is gravy.

ION, I am curious. And narcissistic, but y'all knew that. What first impressions did you have of me? It's always so interesting to hear about how others view you, because you're always, you know, on the inside, and try as you might, you can never really look at yourself from the outside. (I'm not trolling for complis, btw -- so no OMG YOU WERE SO OUTRAGEOUSLY GORGEOUS MY RETINAS STILL BURN -- RRRGHHH, THE SWEET SWEET PAIN STILL LINGERS!!!!)

Tep, take comfort in the Boy's ADD. He'll forget about Legendarina and soon he'll be back in the saddle (so to speak).

David, I know you're being supportive and also (I hope) lighthearted in saying this.

I also know I'm stressed this weekend and therefore much less able to take the piss.

That said, when I read this, all I thought was OUCH. I'm sure you didn't mean it this way, but it read -- to me -- like the only reason The Boy is with me is because I happen to be the one in front of him, due to his easily distractable nature.

Like I said, I'm sure you didn't mean it that way, but still, ouch.

What first impressions did you have of me?

Way more girly than I anticipated. Also, the voice I expected from you later wound up coming out of Jilli. Very sexy and confident and playful and fun. I'll always remember you bouncing on the bed in your room (which was the de facto hospitality suite) with a martini in one hand and a cigarette in the other as you cat-herded the Buffistas. I thought you were totally the Queen of the F2F in Chicago, since you did so much to organize it and (very gently) kept us moving and mingling and putting people at ease. The perfect Cruise Director for the Buffistas.

That said, when I read this, all I thought was OUCH. I'm sure you didn't mean it this way, but it read -- to me -- like the only reason The Boy is with me is because I happen to be the one in front of him, due to his easily distractable nature.

Like I said, I'm sure you didn't mean it that way, but still, ouch.

I'm sorry. Praising and extolling your virtues didn't seem to be sticking or offering any comfort, so I went another way. The wrong way. Though in my defense, nine times out of ten, the snarky way is often the Teppy way.

But for the record, I don't think the boy is with you simply because you're in front of him. I think you two have built up a relationship the old fashioned way, through trust and friendship. I think it runs a lot deeper than you suspect. He loves your company, depends on you, and you totally sex him up.

Speaking for myself, sexual chemistry trumps a lot of things, and it's clear to me that you two do not lack for it.

Teppy, I sent an e-mail to your profile addy. It's kind of time sensitive. Did you get it?

In summation, try not to fall down. Everything besides that is gravy.

I think that's the best I can hope for. Remaining vertical.

ION, I am curious. And narcissistic, but y'all knew that. What first impressions did you have of me? It's always so interesting to hear about how others view you, because you're always, you know, on the inside, and try as you might, you can never really look at yourself from the outside. (I'm not trolling for complis, btw -- so no OMG YOU WERE SO OUTRAGEOUSLY GORGEOUS MY RETINAS STILL BURN -- RRRGHHH, THE SWEET SWEET PAIN STILL LINGERS!!!!)

I love you, Erin, because *I* wanted to ask this (about me), but I already engaged in the whole insecure-not-fishing-for-compliments-my-BF's-ex-is-in-town gambit.

(But I still want to know. Except....not really. Because, this weekend at least, I don't think my ego could take the "I thought you were *nice,*" nonsense.)

(I mean, I know what kind of *first* impression I make. Dorky, somewhat socially retarded, sweet-faced at best. And that's not me running myself down -- I am well aware that my fear of new people makes me come off as a weird little introvert when we first meet. Or I try too hard, and come off as a character from a John Hughes teen-angst movie. It's only when I'm comfortable with people that they get a look at the whole complex weird-ass-but-highly-entertaining Teppy.)

(So maybe I want people's *second* impressions of me.)

(And all y'all can tell me to shut the fuck up and stop being such a narcissistic self-absorbed whiny little bitch who's mean to her friends when they're just trying to me nice. S'cool.)

So maybe I want people's *second* impressions of me.

My first impression of you was fine. We were licking the same bag of Funyuns ten minutes after we met. Plus we slow danced in the bar on the first night. I think you underestimate your first impressionability.