she's a fantastic cook, but I don't know how she does her turkey, what kind of stuffing she makes, what kinds of sides there are going to be...it's going to be all different and weird

Thanksgiving can be as emotionally fraught as any other holiday, don't let anybody tell you different.

We're going to DH's aunt's house, and she's a fantastic cook, but I don't know how she does her turkey, what kind of stuffing she makes, what kinds of sides there are going to be...it's going to be all different and weird and so I'm bringing 2 sides and 2 nibbly things and maybe more if I have the time.

On behalf of your aunt-in-law, may I suggest that you not bring more stuff than you've discussed with her? People in my family love to do this, and it just ends up being a pain in the ass and too much food.

I can't get the tone-deaf test to work! Aaah!

It's not part of everyone's Thanksgiving tradition to have too much food? In our family, it usually goes that we're trying to prevent my grandmother from doing too much work, since she is 80+ and her eyesight is failing. And then we arrive, and she's made two or three side dishes "just in case".

There's too much food, and then there's Too Much Food. We have at least two matriarchs, each of whom commits to one thing, and then brings three or more. We've had as many pies as people, some years.

It is. I haven't made bread in about a year or two, but there is something entirely soothing about kneading. and the smell. Another good thing.

Oh Kat, you just brought back a flood of memories for me. My great-grandmother lived with us until she passed away (age 96: I was 12), and she was an exquisite baker. She first taught me how to knead bread when I was 2 or 3 years old, and one of my favorite pictures from that time shows me standing on a stool next to her, both of us covered in flour as we kneaded the bread dough.

My grandmother picked up the breadmaking tradition after my great-grandmother passed, and my mom says it's a good thing I like baking so the tradition won't be lost. I think you've just inspired me to get Gram's Swedish Rye recipe (it's a sweet light brown bread) and make a loaf for Thanksgiving. Aimee and I are co-hosting, and I'm excited now to bring fresh bread to the table.

75.5%, but there's music playing in the background, and I could have been put off by that.

H will be at the beach, his brother is working and won't be able to fly in from NYC, StY and I may go down to do lunch with my MIL, or more probably stay home with my mom. Whatever we do will be low-key and improvisational, and will incorporate turkey in some form, and the traditional potatoes, sweet potatoes, green beans, canned jellied cranberry sauce, maybe corn and/or carrots, and pumpkin pie. It may all come from cans and boxes, but it will by damn be turkey on Thanksgiving.

We've had as many pies as people, some years.

And this is bad how?

And this is bad how?

First, there's the interpersonal drama: whose apple pie do you pick? Because, yes, usually each grandmother makes an apple pie. Then nobody wants to take the leftovers home after, because everyone's dieting.

I prefer for guests to arrive with one dish and leave with left overs. They are free to leave the pies, however.

You know what I love about Columbus at Thanksgiving? Mid Ohio Con. Turkey and comics! A friend of mine is doing a panel so I'm definitely going.

On behalf of your aunt-in-law, may I suggest that you not bring more stuff than you've discussed with her?

But there are some things you just have to have, or it's not Thanksgiving.