I thought that the good manners of registering for gifts was in how the knowlege of where the happy couple is registered gets passed around - i.e. guests who wish to know asking the bride's mom or bridesmaid where they are registered = cool; all guests whether they like it or not reading a line about the registry in the invite or other mailing = most uncool. It makes sense to me to have the same standards for other gift-giving occasions. If I were queen, it would be ok to register all you wanted, for whatever reason, or no reason - but if you TELL anyone other than your mom, your sister, or your best friend then your behavior will be considered gauche, and you will have to brush up on your manners. Forcibly, if need be.

If your sister or mom or someone not-you sends the invite, is it okay for them to include the registry info on it? Because until you said that, I wouldn't even have known to ask someone where the happy couple was registered if I wasn't told. (Yes, I was born in a barn.) (Actually, on the side of the road.) (Never mind.)

I'd rather the clued-in people think I was unmannerly than have the clueless feel anxious and maybe make a faux-pas that would embarrass them - as has happened to me all too often. Expectations of what's to be done are too different from place to place, and people are so easily miffed if things aren't automatically done their way.

I'm going to be late if I don't get moving. Oddly, that's not motivating me.

Hm, at the point most of my friends were getting married, most of them weren't registered anywhere. But then, my high school was on the "wrong side of the tracks" and most of my friends I don't think knew about registering. Most of them still lived at home with parents and needed absolutely everything, so it was safe to buy almost anything and it would be needed. Now, the hoity-toity folks in Maple Bluff (the one very upper income enclave that felt the burden of attending our plebian high school; as an aside, the Governor's mansion is in MB) probably did have registries at places like Gimbel's and Manchester's.

I like the fact that registering is slowly moving out of the realm of only the wealthiest to the everyman. We have enough class/ethnic/racial distinctions forced on us that it's nice to see some of the economic ones falling to the masses. Yay, masses!

Ok. Time to put on less-jammy looking jammies and go to the post office to mail nasty, threatening letter to old landlord.

As far as I always understood it, the registry information isn't supposed to be printed directly on the invitation, but can be included in the envelope. For instance, you open a wedding invitation and you get: the smaller envelope with the actual invitation, the tiny card and envelope for the RSVP, maybe some directions, and a small card stating "The happy couple is registered at blahblahbiddyblah."

Though, I think with the growing ability to make your own invitations, people are skipping a step. The last baby shower invite I got had registry information printed on it. Just one line, no credit history or measurements. The last invites I sent, I informed everyone when they RSVPd, though most of them knew.

And I think if I ever get married, I'm going to register for fandom toasters. "Pick a show/movie from the following, watch at least a season's worth, then write six paragraphs on why you liked it!"

The one thing I'm really looking forward to with the return of 80s fashion is the return of wearing black tights with dresses and skirts, because it makes it possible for me to wear dresses and skirts in the fall and winter without freezing.

Er. Is this out of style? Because I've been doing this blithely in the 90s and 00s.

I roll my eyes forever about the SS# on the baby ceremony invite.

1. I wear black tights as often as possible.

2. SSN is just wrong people.

3. Registries are good, and I'd never be bothered by the info on an invite--in fact, I'm likely to lose the info for the shower I'm attending next month

Unnumberable, thanks for the hugs guys. I'm alternately shaken and twitchy.

ita, I am very sorry about your friend and colleague.

We registered at Amazon because we were asked to. Since we eloped, presents were not called for and we didn't expect any but folks are nice. We tried to pick lots of things in the $20-$50 range, so no one would have to break the bank. Some lovely friends and family have been giving us stuff, which is lovely!

Registering is not the etiquette issue. Including information about the registry (even just in the envelope) is the faux pas. Etiquette standards generally require that information is only supposed to be supplied if and when a guest inquires (that said, I never mind when I get the info in an envelope, because it can be useful).

I've skimmed & skipped, so excuse me if I'm repeato gal.