We killed a homeless man on this bench. Me and Dru. Those were good times. You know, he begged for mercy, and you know, that only made her bite harder.

Spike ,'Sleeper'


The Great Write Way  

A place for Buffistas to discuss, beta and otherwise deal and dish on their non-fan fiction projects.


Steph L. - Jul 07, 2003 6:20:28 pm PDT #1530 of 10001
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine

It broke me, too. But it says everything I wanted to say, and I'm not sure any other piece of writing I've done has actually been able to do that.

And thank you! That's high praise.


deborah grabien - Jul 07, 2003 6:36:29 pm PDT #1531 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

I posted the last piece of poetry I wrote (October 1994) in my livejournal a few weeks back. It took this long before I could deal with the death it deals with.


Deena - Jul 07, 2003 6:40:14 pm PDT #1532 of 10001
How are you me? You need to stop that. Only I can be me. ~Kara

Oh, Steph, I do like that poem. That's just lovely.


Steph L. - Jul 07, 2003 6:43:30 pm PDT #1533 of 10001
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine

Thank you! I'm not sure I'd go so far as to say it's my best piece of writing, but it's my favorite.


Deena - Jul 07, 2003 6:48:50 pm PDT #1534 of 10001
How are you me? You need to stop that. Only I can be me. ~Kara

I'm a poetry philistine. I love some of it. I wish I could write it. (I'm like that, "I don't know art, but I know what I like" guy) But a lot of it that other, better authors and/or critics love, I don't get. This makes me feel stupid. For a poem to move me it has to move me (huh, not sure I like the way I phrased that but, carrying on) usually with a story of some sort. That one moved me.


Steph L. - Jul 07, 2003 7:01:55 pm PDT #1535 of 10001
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine

t now rifling through my (meagre) pile of poetry...

This one amuses me. I wrote it last Fall (obviously), when I was playing with structure:

Daylight Savings Time

I shake my tiny fist ineffectually
at the 5:00 darkness.
An hour stolen with the
turn of a dial.

Shadows creep into corners
that only a week ago
held puddles of sunshine.

Gloom is the backdrop
as day is kidnapped by night.

The days grow shorter.


deborah grabien - Jul 07, 2003 7:08:23 pm PDT #1536 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

I tend to avoid the whole structure issue (when I'm writing it, not reading it) unless I'm sitting down to write a villanelle or a sestina or a particular structure. Otherwise, I just let it rip.

But I very much liked that one, Steph, because I love the sense of individual vignettes all leading down the same road.


Steph L. - Jul 07, 2003 7:12:14 pm PDT #1537 of 10001
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine

Well, I've had my fights with vilanelles and pantoums. But the idea of losing time and then losing a line per stanza was too good to pass up.

I may be the next great voice in light verse. Just you wait.


deborah grabien - Jul 07, 2003 7:20:53 pm PDT #1538 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

I may be the next great voice in light verse. Just you wait.

Hee! I believe it.

And besides, you could offer it as a course should you happen to open a writing school.

Somewhere other than where you are, that is.

I'm just saying....


Deena - Jul 08, 2003 2:40:28 am PDT #1539 of 10001
How are you me? You need to stop that. Only I can be me. ~Kara

I didn't even get the losing a line... Yes, it's proven, I'm a poetry moron.