glitteriness of her hoo-haw was revealed
Wren is Bella?
Riley ,'Potential'
There's more to life than watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer! No. Really, there is! Honestly! Here's a place for Buffistas to come and discuss what it is they're reading, their favorite authors and poets. "Geez. Crack a book sometime."
glitteriness of her hoo-haw was revealed
Wren is Bella?
Or Jennifer Love Hewitt.
I tend to think of 'hero' as a gender neutral word.
No, I get it. Wren certainly seems as though she's the "hero" of the book, being the protagonist and main character.
Dargan Knight is a pretty great name, though.
If it's a romance, there's a hero *and* a heroine, as ever. This chick just ... sucks. Which is why she's essentially self-publishing.
I think being embroiled in fantasy has skewed me.
When mocking writing, I always have the inner fear that mine is even worse.
What gets me is that the book is WOVEN ... is this some new kind of craft?
My novel got the ultimate bad "review" in that my mother got to some point halfway and couldn't finish it...the only bright spot is that I think we saw problems at the same spot. But, still, that kind of stung. I still like the first half, though. Not as badly as if it had come out and people were pointing and laughing and shit, though.
Why couldn't she finish it?
It seems to have lost the attention of most of my intimates about page 200, Connie. But when I asked her why, she thought I was pissed(or maybe she's just not used to taking written things apart, and felt she didn't have the words to explain.) I even tried "Pretend you bought this and I didn't write it," but it didn't really help. I have a bunch of great characters looking for a plot was my opinion, when I read it back last.
You know, I wish my on-line Comp course wasn't preloaded, because having my students transform epubbed romance paragraphs into correct grammatical constructions would be a lot more entertaining than sentences about Socrates and Thrasymachus.
"The dripping wetness" is the subject; dripping modifies wetness. It's a descriptor.
"Her cavern that was honeyed was being explored by the sword of man which belonged To Dragan." Watch typos, please, and put this into ACTIVE voice. What is the subject? The man-sword. To whom did it belong? What is Dragan's man-sword doing?