Choking, snorting, laughter is inappropriate, right?

Deeply. You should be ashamed of yourself.

As only a sexually insatiable female moron can.

someone's been reading Salon...

had a friend deliver this afternoon. Idiot woman refused to eat the last 2 months cause she didn't want to gain weight - no doubt from her husbnd calling her "fat" all the time - 40+ weeks and he was 5 pounds. FIVE POUNDS

And this is a FRIEND? Good christ.

Of course, I'm not good with the dieting in any case, but when pregnant I can't even imagine having any willpower. I fear if I ever get pregnant I"ll gain like, 60 pounds.

Heh, try 57 pounds, meara. And it was as bad as not gaining enough. I ended up on 6 weeks of bedrest because of toxemia. I made sure with my second pregnancy to only gain 27 pounds so it didn't happen again.

try 57 pounds, meara. And it was as bad as not gaining enough. I ended up on 6 weeks of bedrest because of toxemia

Eek! Yeah, and since both of my parents have diabetes, I'd likely end up with that too. Gee, being pregnant sounds like such fun! NOT. And yet I still hope to do it some day. Crazy, we are, humans...

Crazy, we are, humans...

It's those cute, little, naked, thrall-monsters. They have an eerie mind control over us; the more of them we are exposed to, the more we want one of our own. I recommend hard-boiling to prevent it from happening to you.

If I were Klingon, I would kill my manager and take her diploma. Coworkers regularly come to me for explanations for the incoherent entries bosslady makes in the communication log. This is because she sometimes treats them as though they are stupid for not being able to understand. I can tease the meanings out of them because I know enough about this business to know the patterns of what meanings are possible. The woman has a Bachelor's Degree. She managed to satisfy the academic requirements of an institution of higher learning WITHOUT FUCKING LEARNING HOW TO PUT TOPIC SENTENCES IN PARAGRAGHS SO THAT PEOPLE HAVE A BLOODY FUCKING CLUE WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT. They god fucking damn well gave her a degree while the universe sat back, pointing and laughing at me as destroyed my health and sanity working as hard as I did to NOT finish school.

Back in Arizona, I was taught that when an incident happened involving more than one client in a group home, I would have to write two incident reports, one for each person - using the name of an individual, and the initials of the other to maintain privacy, then turn about and do the same for the second. It makes sense to me to write one IR for each person's file. Here at the new job in Minnesota, bosslady specifically told me to write ONE incident report. There's a written reminder on the form to use only initials for everyone if more than one person is involved.

Yesterday, one of our residents clobbered another who then became hysterical, twenty minutes before the end of my shift. We managed to separate them, get them both calmed down in about 15 minutes. Then I called the manager to give her the heads'-up, and she reiterated that I should write one IR, and reminded me of the four other places in which the incident needed to be documented. She spent 8 minutes reminding me in detail not to use full names on the IR. She also got confused when I mentioned I would not be clocking out on time. Gee, bosslady, I've got 5 forms to fill out with fairly lengthy naratives, and you really think I'll get that done in the three minutes before my shift is over?

She called me this morning, insisting I come to write TWO incident reports, in much the same way I would have done based on my training in Arizona had she not specifically trained me otherwise.

"I thought you of all people would know to write it that way," she said.

"I used to, back in Arizona, before y'all told me to do it differently here."

"Who told you that?"

"You did."

"Oh, sorry."

I recommend hard-boiling to prevent it from happening to you.

Right. Excellent. Do I boil the thrall-monster, my insides, or my whole self?

I've invented leasagna. It is like lasagna but uses zucchini instead of pasta. it is tasty and sagnaesque but too watery. I have cut out a piece and am attemptind drainage.