Don't make me get nostalgic for Bull Durham! Respect for Kevin Costner belongs to another period in my psychological development, like the belief that pulling the covers up past my eyes would keep me safe from monsters under the bed.

Respect for Kevin Costner belongs to another period in my psychological development, like the belief that pulling the covers up past my eyes would keep me safe from monsters under the bed.

What do you mean? Kevin Costner never made another movie. He died young or vanished into the hills or somesuch, leaving behind a fan base that's always wondered what else he might've done. Some cynics would say that at least his mysterious disappearance kept that "post man" movie from ever being made, but I always figured the leaked script had to be some kind of sick spoof. And not even a very well done one.

Curiously, given my almost-bulletproof love for Sports Comedies With Romance (see: The Cutting Edge, Men With Brooms, A Knights Tale, and, yes, Tin Cup), my dislike of Bull Durham confuses even me.

I think it's the baseball.

I really don't like baseball.

Kevin Costner never made another movie.

Hugs TIN CUP close

Ron Shelton really did get the best out of Costner. It's a shame the same couldn't be said of Sam Raimi.

When Bing Crosby would screw up a take while recording a song, he would habitually use blue language, including "fuck," not just in reaction to the mess-up but also by continuing singing with the words laced into the lyrics, so that the recording guys would destroy that take instead of keeping it and making bootleg copies of the botched version.

Oh man, somebody should have bootlegged them anyway. That would be hysterical to hear now.

They are available on the essential Celebrities At Their Worst compilation by Nick Bougas. I've got them around here somewhere. When I find them I'll post Bing's blown takes. There's also the unfuckinbelievable Earl Weaver going off in a post-game show about the uselessness of "team speed" when you just need a "big cocksucker who can hit the ball out."

Now Earl Weaver was a poet.

And possibly also a hooplehead.

Now Earl Weaver was a poet.

Okay, Earl's up at Buffistarawk. I threw in Ernie Anderson (aka, Ghoulardi) who was the voice for ABC in the early 70s. His sound editor ran all his cockups together into one glorious profane spew.

Bing's on disc 2 which isn't on my computer and I've got to locate it.

For Aimee, Grace, Clark & Ava in Mogambo

Though it should be noted that there's some funky perspective going on in that picture; in the actual film, Grace is a good few inches taller than Ava. Which is weird and disconcerting, because Ava's presence is so vividly large that it doesn't seem possible that some willowy blonde could just pop up and loom over her. Ava should loom. It just isn't right that she should be loomed over (except by Clark).

I can't get that page to load, Hec.