juliana, do you still have my cell? Call anytime you get stuck and lost in those 12 days, and Hec and I will seduce you with tales of good things to come, all the wonders to be found in your new neighborhood (the Afghan restaurant, the bookstores, the jazz clubs, the bar with working gaslights), the steampunk waltz parties and bubblegum-pop-with-fetishwear parties, playreadings, circus skills classes, deb's attention-hungry kittens, Bimbo's 365 Club with its resident mermaid... I know it will probably be 12 terrible days, but you'll be amply rewarded, cosseted, petted and cuddled and entertained for your courage in getting through them.

A sombrero.

A frog would be kind of festive, as long as it was sparkly.

You have a very individual approach to winter solstice.

Not that there's anything wrong with that...

What else would make a good Holiday Tree topper?

A monkey in a fez. Especially cool if it was a real monkey that would periodically fling candy at passing children.

juliana, do you still have my cell? Call anytime you get stuck and lost in those 12 days, and Hec and I will seduce you with tales of good things to come, all the wonders to be found in your new neighborhood (the Afghan restaurant, the bookstores, the jazz clubs, the bar with working gaslights), the steampunk waltz parties and bubblegum-pop-with-fetishwear parties, playreadings, circus skills classes, deb's attention-hungry kittens, Bimbo's 365 Club with its resident mermaid... I know it will probably be 12 terrible days, but you'll be amply rewarded, cosseted, petted and cuddled and entertained for your courage in getting through them.

Yes. What she said.

Sadly the Jamaica Star headline "Man needs help finding new ass" doesn't live up to my initial expectations. Hella sad, though. And I love the fact he uses the word "sabotage."

the bar with working gaslights

Wow, where?

I've been known to send anything that has to be mailed home with my mom along with some cash. Unfortunately, she left too early this morning. She's one of those strange people that likes going to the post office. It might help that she lives in a small town.

What else would make a good Holiday Tree topper?

A monkey in a fez. Especially cool if it was a real monkey that would periodically fling candy at passing children.

Or, you know, whatever else is handy.

You have a very individual approach to winter solstice.

I come from a family that has decorated a dead yucca stalk, norfolk island pines and on one occasion, three small trees clumped together to look kinda like one. We didn't have the easter bunny, we had the easter jackrabbit.

I come by it honestly.

(actually, if it isn't the One True Tree, which has sort of been retired in favor of more family, I am inclined to go for way out whacky if I'm going to bother at all.)

Or, you know, whatever else is handy.

That wouldn't be very festive. You'd have to be sure to feed the monkey red and green glitter first.