Different currencies, I suppose. I've never been to a party with a cover charge, not a private one.

I would have been fine with a pot-luck, I'm used to those. But asking for cash, I dunno. Bothers me.

I'll probably go: the hostess is my former boss and a good friend. I'm just vaguely freaked, especially since I'm already having to get in costume for the thing. Bah. Perhaps I am just anti-social.

But what I'm saying is that the practice of just bringing stuff for your host (which is what I was talking about from the start, hence the mention of flowers) is SOP enough that it doesn't twig me, and I was extrapolating that to it not affecting my expectations of the party.

Ah. I don't know. I think bringing a gift versus "You have to pay me $10 to walk through this door" are completely different vibes, even if gift could concievably cost more than the cover charge. But I think it's just a matter of different social conventions, as I've yet to be invited to a party where (barring the previously mentioned special occaisions) gifting the host or paying to get in was SOP.

And now I'm off to the city to see some actors perform 30 plays in 60 minutes. I'm curious how many of them will involve "Fitzmas". I'm willing to bet at least one, though I'll die if they actually use the term.

I'm wondering if it's more normal in black circles, or Jamaican ones, or what. It surprises me that it's a deal for anyone, and I'm wondering where I got this acculturation.

I had a friend who had a party that she charged for. She and her housemates basically needed to raise some cash. It was pretty expensive and open to anyone who found out about it. Fortunately the cops didn't, or at least didn't care. Knowing her, I'm sure that the party was great, but more than slightly illegal as they were flaunting liquor laws and I'm fairly certain there were some substances around that are illegal in any circumstance, at least in this country. Not that I'm in any way implying that this would be the case for the party in question here. But given that this was the only fee-based party I had heard of before, initially my thought was ew!spam. It sounds like this party will be much nicer!

I've seen mentions in books (fiction and etiquette) and in movies and TV about hostess gifts for parties. Miss Manners advises to err on the side of not bringing a gift, because that's one more thing that the host/ess has to deal with, especially when the giver expects the gift (flowers or wine or what-have-you) to be incorporated in the event.

I was not raised in a world that gave dinner parties--or at least, was never invited--so I am completely unindoctrinated on such etiquette.

I've been invited to parties that involved charges by friendly acquaintances who work in a restaurant ($100 a plate? Wow.... thanks for thinking of me, really), but I've never encountered it for a party in a private home.

Has anyone here ever used Expedia to buy tickets? Ten days ago, I bought my ticket to NY on American Airlines via Expedia, and the service charge (charged by expedia) has shown up on my credit card statement, but the actual ticket (charged by AA) has not. My big worry is that in the meantime, I got a new credit card, so I am worried that when AA try to actually charge me for my ticket, it won't go through and I will be screwed.

My itinerary on Expedia is confirming the ticket purchase by AA, but where's the charge?

I have. If there's too much lag time before the tickets arrive, I'd print out the confirmation e-mail from Expedia and take it to the airport just in case.

In my (limited, white, american Middle Atlantic) experience, only college students who can't BYOB have cover charges for a party. So a cast party with my students might have a charge, because there are plenty of people not over 21 who need the booze purchased for them, but a party with my colleagues would either have the host (or the theatre department) paying for the party, or ask us all to bring a 6 pack or abottle of wine.

Ball’s series is based on the series of novels by Charlaine Harris.

not crazy about the books.

Take a bottle of something or flowers or something for the host is pretty common at most gatherings or parties at a house I've been to in the city, but the only time there has been a charge has been when someone rents out a place for a big party.

caught up on some more tv.

Nip/Tuck continues to disturb, but also seemed clunky.

VM was enh.

I think bringing a gift versus "You have to pay me $10 to walk through this door" are completely different vibes, even if gift could concievably cost more than the cover charge.

For me, part of the difference is that the gift is not required, even if it's somewhat expected in some circumstances.

All this kind of makes me want to check out a paid party, only the one I described is the only one I've ever heard of before. Consuela, if you think about it, I'd love to hear how it turns out.