I really didn't want to turn into one of "those mothers" who doesn't let the father near the kid, but I may be on that path this morning.

Poor Raq.

Time for the "Mal waking me up anyway is not you watching Mal" chat. One of those annoingly obvious things you need to explain anyway -- I SUCK at those.

DH was snoring fast asleep with Bobby sitting on his chest wailing.

BWAH!

DH still lives. He was "working." Yeah, I feel his pain.

I tried the going-out passive style of making him take care of Mallory. I left first thing on a Saturday morning and returned around noon. Mallory had had 4 oz of milk ("He wouldn't eat any more"), had not been changed from his overnight diaper, was still in his pajamas, and hadn't taken a nap. DH was a bit frazzled by M's whining/fussing, and had retreated to the back room.

We had "the talk."

Now he's very conscientious about saying "Do you think he's ready for a nap?" or "Do you think he's ready for food?" but...you know, I think part of the problem is that when we got our cat, lo these 13 years ago, the deal was that I could get a cat if I did all the cat chores, like feeding him and changing the box. That probably set a bad precedent.

Conciencious about fine points is good -- but dirty crying baby is a pretty clear signal for what needs to change. I mean, if he'd TRIED clean 'em and feed 'em and Mal was still howling that would be different.

Silly husband. Change the baby.

I know. It boggles me. I'm still trying to get through to him why I was crabby about this morning. I mean, he was already up, and as far as I could tell, just dinking on the computer. And I gave him a chance to say "No, I can't watch him."

Ah well, c'est la guerre.

Raq--Can you reveal to him that one learns how to parent by just, well, trying stuff until something works? Give him a template for what to do--first, check diaper, then try distracting, then feed (or whathever order you do things in). Tell him it's his job to keep trying approaches until something works.

I'm giving thanks right now for Christopher. He may not do everything exactly like I would but he's right on top of giving me as much of a break as he can between working and studying for his actuarial exam.

He may feed the kid string cheese and cheerios for breakfast and Owen may be in mismatched pj tops & bottoms when I wake up (from a nap or on a weekend morning), but the diaper is usually* usually a fresh one.

And it's been a really tough few days, too, since O has thrown off his sleeping schedule and is waking a few times at night and has woken for good around 5 a.m. EVERY FREAKIN' MORNING.

• I say usually because DH does kind of have a handicap with smelling poopy diapers. But he changes them when he does figure it out.

In our household, string cheese and cheerios would be a remarkably healthy and well-balanced meal. Today, breakfast was many black olives, a strawberry and 3 grapes, and orange juice.

Dinner last night was milk, 3 bites of my milkshake, 6 french fries, lots of ketchup (mainly ingested off the fingers), and 2 bites of a dill pickle.

We do TRY, I swear.

We do TRY, I swear.

AMEN SISTAH! I keep putting veggies out there and he keeps not eating them. He only wants fruit. And those mini Cheez-It crackers.

Raq, Scott suggests you give your dh a boot in the ass.

Robin, I'm glad to find out that "that one learns how to parent by just trying stuff until something works". I always thought I was broken because I'm so helpless around babies. I thought one was just supposed to know what to do with them. Not that I ever expect to be a parent, but at least I don't feel so bad.