The goofballs shall inherit the earth.

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Yet female pornography has for decades been an accepted pastime, sliding under the radar of the religious right and instead being promoted as an acceptable distraction from the worries of life. But what exactly is female porn? Is there a definition for this newly discovered blight on society? For the answer to this question, we need look no further than the honorable Mr. Webster and his infamous dictionary of words. How we overlooked this definition for years upon years we do not know. But we are here today to uncover the truth. To shed light in the dark. And so without further ado here it is:

pornography – 3: the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction

Catch that? Emotional. We contend that the job of the chick flick, romance novel, and love song is to arouse a quick, intense emotional reaction. Can you feel it? We ask you, ladies, what else arouses a stronger emotion in you than that heart-fluttering chick flick? What else gets you to dream of the perfect man and pray to God that you will get one just like him?

And you don't want to put up with this goob any longer? Shocked! Shocked, I am!

edited to mention that this is in response to cass, not porn.

What really cracks me up is that apparently the Pottery Barn catalog is just as sinful as romance novels. I mean, Dylan and I do call the Williams-Sonoma catalog kitchen porn, but really.

One of my co-workers mentioned the other day she was "going to see a chick flick." I asked her which one. Her reply? "Lord of War"

pornography – 3: the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction

I am calling the bank and telling them that sending my credit card statement is illegal and a blight on society.

Dylan claims any movie featuring a good-looking actor in period costume is a chick flick, no matter how testosterone-laden the storyline is. The Sharpe movies? Total chick flicks. It took some persuading to get him to see Master & Commander with me because that's such a classic Susan chick flick set-up.

I just thought it was amusing to see how someone's idea of a "chick flick" varies from the usual definition. But Sharpe ... yeah.

But the thing about those article (and anyone who reads the Smart Bitches Who Love Trashy Books blog will realize I'm repeating myself--I can only have so many original thoughts in a day) is that these people are completely serious, and it's scary. I heard the same argument made, minus Pottery Barn absurdity, in my InterVarsity Christian Fellowship chapter in college during a talk on lust. The women were advised not to read romance novels of any sensuality level because it creates unrealistic expectations and you'll be disappointed when your husband isn't able to sweep you off your feet like that.

Yeah, whatever. Problem is, at the time I believed it, and I think I delayed learning the really important lessons on handling relationships in a mature manner in accordance with my values, my faith, and the general ideal of respecting myself and others, because I was so busy slapping my brain down every time I had a sexual thought and avoiding the evil temptations of a Regency romance.

And while I do think it's possible to get too involved in a fantasy world if your romance reading or gaming or whatever causes you to neglect your real-life responsibilities, I think it's a lot more risky and damaging to condemn imagination and daydreaming of a better future altogether--which IMO that article comes all too close to doing.

I really don't like these people and what they're doing in the name of my religion.

My mom and I watched "Serpico" together once. I leave it to others to define the chick flick. What's wrong with a little fantasy?

What Susan Said. All of it.