Hey, J.Bouch. I sent you an email yesterday, but your server has been kind enough to tell me that I'm a potential spammer persona non grata, thank you very much, and that I have to click a particular link if I wish to bypass this security measure and speak to a real, live human being. Unfortunately, the link goes nowhere. You know, now that I think about this, the same thing happened the last time I contact Blue Cross Blue Shield. Have they taken over your email server?

I'm a potential spammer persona non grata

That's because I have the filter cranked up all the way & it wasn't ready for the name variation. Mr. C.I. Hotmail was on the guest list, but Mr. C.I. Gmail wasn't. Your various noms d'email are now in the system & you shouldn't have any more problems with the bouncer.

I have another Wire-related pitch which I can't write myself - about how complex the relationship between fact and fiction is in Simon's work

I actually pitched a similar idea to Corwood way back when, except it was about the relationship between fact & fiction in the films of Kiarostami & Makhmalbaf, particularly the former's Close Up and the latter's Salaam Cinema and A Moment of Innocence. They're houses of mirrors, endlessly reflexive, completely blurring the lines between documentary and fiction. So I'll second Jim's suggestion, throw in a promise to follow through on my long-ago pitch, and raise it to a theme, The High Hat's Fact and Fiction Issue. I'll dig out Hannah Arendt's essays on truth and lying in politics that I've been meaning to send to you, Corwood. Seems like a perfect time for it given that we're living in a time and (some of us) in a country being run by people who simultaneously assail "relativism" and deny the claims of science/media/anyone they don't agree with "you have your 'facts' and I have mine, and I just don't buy yours -- nyah nyah!"

And I'll throw Jackie Wilson's "Higher and Higher" into the perfect pop song ring. And with James Jamerson on my side I will prevail!

I'll second Jim's suggestion, throw in a promise to follow through on my long-ago pitch, and raise it to a theme, The High Hat's Fact and Fiction Issue.

Excellent! I especially hope that there might be a crossword in it for us, too.

Look...I may be a pretty practiced Simon geek and of murder and mayhem of all descriptions, but would some brilliant person post characteristics of a Perfect Pop song, cause I bet I have one, but around here I'm "too green to be brown" You feel me? Yo hablo poquito de "Music Geek". Mas despacio, por favor. Muchismas gracias.

Nah, Perfect Pop is pure relativism. Your own description is the only one you need.

Well, you know, I thought there was a list. Let me think, then. Old-School "Good Vibrations" by the Beach Boys and "Cruisin'" By Smokey Robinson and the Miracles Will post some more modern picks in a while. Promise.

It's gotta have a bridge.

I Want it that Way - BSB

The Perfect Pop Song is a Potter Stewart thing, if anyone understands what I mean by that.

It has to hook you.

The refrain doesn't necessarily have to be singable, but it helps if it is.

It has to be well-crafted, well-produced, and built to deliver 3-5 minutes of musical bliss.

It doesn't necessarily have to be "all-time great" or by a "pop god."

Perfect Pop is not bubblegum, but bubblegum is often Perfect Pop.

It doesn't have to have a happy ending.

Most of all, you listen to it, and your first instinct is to listen to it again. And again.

That's about the best I can do. I lean on Potter Stewart most of the time with my definition.

"Waltz the Halls Always" by Game Theory.