Maybe you could pose while holding a futuristic UFO-destroying gun....

I have a couple of these, though the UFO-destroying capabilities may not be the best. Unless UFOs can be destroyed by lighted plastic guns that make fun noises.

No one wants to own it.

Is it a space station? Or, say, my office?

Unless UFOs can be destroyed by lighted plastic guns that make fun noises.

They can be very effective on the bordomites from the planet bordomia when they attack in their beige, brick-shaped UFOs.

OMG, WHY must some people insist on doing phone support for shit that is better left to text? Especially when they are the talk around the problem for 15 minutes and aren't particularly computer competent type?

And this one EXPECTS me to stay on the phone as he futzes and fusses and OY!

I don't need to listen to you explain to me why you can't manage simple widgets that are sort of universal across software.

My ear is going numb.

[link]

RICHMOND, Va. - A rush to purchase $50 used laptops turned into a violent stampede Tuesday, with people getting thrown to the pavement, beaten with a folding chair and nearly driven over. One woman went so far to wet herself rather than surrender her place in line.

I'm not sure how much money I'd have to save before I'd wet myself....

I'm not sure how much money I'd have to save before I'd wet myself....

You couldn't pay me the value of a laptop to wet myself....

Speaking of computer stuff, there's a great article in Wired about the expectations of the Internet ten years ago (it's the 10-year anniversary of the Netscape IPO that put the Internet on the map). I loved this:

What could be a better mark of irreversible acceptance than adoption by the Amish? I was visiting some Amish farmers recently. They fit the archetype perfectly: straw hats, scraggly beards, wives with bonnets, no electricity, no phones or TVs, horse and buggy outside. They have an undeserved reputation for resisting all technology, when actually they are just very late adopters. Still, I was amazed to hear them mention their Web sites.

"Amish Web sites?" I asked.

"For advertising our family business. We weld barbecue grills in our shop."

"Yes, but..."

"Oh, we use the Internet terminal at the public library. And Yahoo!"

I knew then the battle was over.

Especially when they are the talk around the problem for 15 minutes and aren't particularly computer competent type?

And this one EXPECTS me to stay on the phone as he futzes and fusses and OY!

Ah, these people are the reason why, when I call phone support, they keep me on the line going, "OK, now click Start. Got it? You should see..." I always want to say, "Can you just tell me what to do and I'll call you back if it doesn't work??"

"Oh, we use the Internet terminal at the public library. And Yahoo!"

That's hot.

I thought it was the teenagers who did all the web stuff for their Amish communities (before they officially convert and have to start avoiding electricity).

I thought it was the teenagers who did all the web stuff for their Amish communities (before they officially convert and have to start avoiding electricity).

Is there a browser that would run on a horse-powered difference engine?