I've been thinking "at least this is better than yesterday's worst-pain rundowns,"

That's also because you're sticking to mammal bestiality. Once you get into ocean life, it gets worse.

::tries to not think about fish tacos::

Why do I seem to remember a case of dolphins sexually assaulting humans (I'm pretty sure they do it to their neighbours)?

There's nothing worse than bestiality, except bestiality puns

Didn't Oscar Wilde say that?

I thought he said, "The only thing worse than fucking a sheep is not fucking one."

But I'm sure it's more than possible to make the horse stand there (horses are restrained for legit reasons, aren't they) while you bone it.

I think the term "stump-broke cattle" applies here.

I think you people are sick enough freaks that you could be elected to office in Texas, and I mean that as a compliment. Oh wait, no I don't.

I'm pretty sure they do it to their neighbours

Yes, dolphins will rape other dolphins. Sometimes gang-rape. IIRC, the rapists are dolphins that aren't getting any.

IIRC, the rapists are dolphins that aren't getting any.

So it's about the sex, not the power?

Why do I seem to remember a case of dolphins sexually assaulting humans (I'm pretty sure they do it to their neighbours)?

I think there was a link to something about that here. Sometime in the last year or so.

Or maybe it was on Scrubs.

Aha!

NORWEGIAN MAN ACCUSES DOLPHIN OF ATTEMPTED RAPE

Date: 17-Aug-99 10:28 pm
Newspaper: Regular International

Comments

Oslo, Aug 17 Reuters - A Norwegian man is accusing a dolphin of attempted rape.

Norway's top-selling daily Verdens Gang on Tuesday quoted the 28-year-old as saying that the dolphin apparently mistook him for a female after swimming alongside him in the sea off Farsund, south Norway, earlier this month.

The dolphin's penis got caught between the man's swimming costume and his legs before the man, who declined to give his name, managed to clamber back on board his boat.

``The dolphin shoved me forward two or three metres before I got loose,'' he said. ``At first I thought it was a fin...but dolphins don't have fins on their underbellies.''

A friend of the man, a diving instructor who saw the attack, told Verdens Gang that the dolphin ``tried it on with me too, but I was wearing protection -- a wetsuit''.

A horse can easily do a double-kick to a man's head with his forehooves - that's what warhorses were trained to do. But the horse has to be trained to do it. Unless you stupidly walk into the middle of a stallion fight or something.

If the guy was "catcher" (boggles), then my guess is that ~1200 pounds of weight crashing down on him is what killed him. Unless he had a rig like Catherine the Great was supposed to have used, the horse mounting the puny little man would've been a killer.

When Plei posted this earlier, the article said something like "bestiality is illegal in 30 states" - so that's 20 where it's legal. Does this country make any sense?

then my guess is that ~1200 pounds of weight crashing down on him is what killed him

Nope - infection resulting from a perforation of the colon. There's enough room under there, isn't there, for access without having to support the horse yourself, isn't there? It'd require some contortion, I guess.

But hey! Banging like a stallion!

If the guy was "catcher" (boggles), then my guess is that ~1200 pounds of weight crashing down on him is what killed him.

Nope. Things were too large for other things, which ruptured and got infected.

I TOLD SF WE WERE STILL THE FREAKIEST!