You always talk about her being angry with you, though. What sorts of things is she angry about?

Not having the emotion. Faking it doesn't really work, she can tell. There are a number of other things that have made her angry. Having to stay late at work, not hearing her correctly, not doing housework, asking what she wants for dinner, and other little things.

Oh, Gud. I'm so sorry. That's so hard, and I don't know how else you could handle the work thing. I mean, when you have to work, you have to work.

Does she work outside the home?

No, she's a SAHM

Asking what she wants for dinner? I don't see what is angry-making in that.

I'm a sahm. Dh helps (a lot) but I don't think I get mad at him when he doesn't or can't. We mostly have an inside (me)/outside (him) split with chores (and we're both not top notch about getting things done in a timely manner, so we generally try to shut up about the other person's sins of omission). What sort of housework are you talking about?

Asking what she wants for dinner? I don't see what is angry-making in that.

Gotta agree with Robin, here. Please someone, ask me what I want for dinner.

Asking what she wants for dinner? I don't see what is angry-making in that.

It's complicated and passive aggressive.

Huh. Sounds like when she gets mad, what it's about isn't what it's about, which is pretty standard. Does she have a good circle of adult friends to talk to? Did she work before she had the kidlets?

Yay for Calli's bits!

Why not - she'd love it. Mind, I expect everybody to load up on makeup and everybody else to buy clothes too. There might need to be some eating and drinking involved as well.

Hec is a cruel, cruel man, but I'm sure we'd suffer through. Nobly.

must see j. in person soon

Yes! Must meet erika! (Hec flatters, BTW. We love him anyway.)

Oh, Gud. I'm so sorry, sweetie. Hugs. You've got some good adive up there, and a whole lot of love.

Asking what she wants for dinner? I don't see what is angry-making in that.

I don't either, but it totally rings a bell as one of those totally-non-important things that somehow becomes a big deal when there's a lot of unrelated resentment coming from somewhere. I think dinner is not the issue.

I don't either, but it totally rings a bell as one of those totally-non-important things that somehow becomes a big deal when there's a lot of unrelated resentment coming from somewhere.

Rings mine, too, because that's how both Paul and I are. Usually, we're able to break through the surface reason to articulate the underlying issue, which is good.