Okay. So Tim wore jeans, a blue shirt, and a sort of tweed kind of jacket. And his new glasses which frame his face well. The Manolo, he would have approved of Tim's Bruno Magli shoes.

John picked us up. I went through the gate. I can't tell you what I saw, as a non-disclosure agreement pops out of the code box and you have to sign it before entering.

On the way, Tim said, "so what am I doing?" a whole lot. Then we got to the thing, and the conference people treated my like I Was Very Important. The tables had turned. I could make insane demands, and they would have bent to my will. I did not take advantage of this.

Oh, this isn't about me. Right.

So the thing started after two people molested Tim with a mike wire thing and I was like, OMG SO JEALOUS.

There was about 250 people there. We saw that they all had these little sheets to grade Tim's performance, and John snapped, "DO NOT TELL HIM ABOUT THAT UNTIL AFTER."

Okey dokey, then.

Tim started the class by explaining a bit about story breaking and asking for a show of hands for which show they'd like to break. It was a pretty even vote between Firefly and Angel, so Tim suggested a crossover in which Mal and Angel fuck.

I would like to state here for the record, that Tim stole that idea from me.

But they decided to break an Angel. Tim took suggestions from the class, and shot people down gently, explained why, and moved on. It took about an hour to get the theme, and write the teaser.

The plot was to occur during season 2 of Angel, and it was decided that Phantom Dennis would become corporeal taking the form of Cordy's Dream Man (sort of like the episode when Jan made up George Glass on the Brady Bunch) and get to romance her for one day.

Lots and lots of audience participation involving a sound guy running around with a microphone. Tim, who ordinarily is honeypie, played a sadistic game of choosing a raised hand from the far left, then the front right. Eventually, the guy with the mike said, "I HATE you" into the mike, and then ge was broken and people just yelled suggestions.

Tim ran it like a real writer's room, only about 4 notches kinder, and they managed to break the teaser and two acts before he took questions.

He spilled a sooper seekrit plot that never came to be on Firefly, and talked about Joss humping a couch. This will be available on the extended version of the DVD.

At the end, Tim went outside to smoke, and about two dozen hopeful writers surrounded him and John and just stared at them. Which was skeery and I thought that they were going to kill them and drink their blood, but then I just realized it was awe, and they started asking a lot of questions.

I passed a note to John during the Q&A, when Tim was being HUGELY charming and the whole audience wanted to lick his brain:

When he does this, I get a terrible crush. He's adorable.

There was a girl outside GUSHING on a cell about talking to Tim. SO CUTE. That was me once. SAD.

I will now open this up to Q&A.

So I killed the thread dead, then, right? Look. It was a five minute review. I haven't slept in like, 24 hours. I'm tired.

WHEN I CAME HERE THERE WAS NOTHING ON THE BOARD.

What did you wear, Allyson?

I wore jeans and a t-shirt and my mary janes with the black cat buckles.

I WAS SO CUTE. Kristen was cuter.

And you know what? Tim? Really good teacher. He explained things really well, and people were raising their hands pitching some great ideas for the story the entire time.

He didn't pull a lot of punches and was honest with them without crushing anyone, I think. Which I think is difficult in a room full of people that so wanted to impress him, and he would have to say, "No, that isn't this, and here's why."

I actually learned an assload in between worrying if he was hungry or getting tired.

Awwww...Allyson is clearly the nicest one.

Sorry, msbelle.

Allyson, one of my first questions to Jilli tonight about L.A. was, "So, how was Allyson's hair?!?" (because I am a dork, I admit)

So, having heard it was fabulous two weeks ago, was it also fabulous tonight?

bahahaha! I'm charmed that all the questions are about Allyson's sartorial and grooming choices!

So, Tim, did you have fun? Are you thinking of becoming the Tony Robbins of screenwriters? Did you have that delicious moment of feeling like a cat in a room full of coyotes, knowing that they would devour you given their druthers, but that you could charm them anyhow?

What was the sooper seekrit Firefly plot?!?

Also, this was my favorite part:

Then we got to the thing, and the conference people treated my like I Was Very Important.

Last night I dreamed I won a chance to talk to Tim on the phone, by finding one of his baby pictures. (Apparently, Tim was a cute kid.) Then I babbled into the phone, and he replied with curt and bemused one-syllable answers, so it was a lot like real life would've been.

The teaching thing sounds like it was great fun for all. So, what was the sooper seekrit Firefly plot, already? And why was Joss humping a couch?

So, having heard it was fabulous two weeks ago, was it also fabulous tonight?

It was ratty. I SO need to get it trimmed. Split ends suck.

So, what was the sooper seekrit Firefly plot, already?

I was all guarded about answering this, and then realized it's now on DVD. Funny how I never shake that. I can't spill seekrits. Even when no longer seekrits. Here goes it, and forgive that I'm not as good at telling the story.

Whitefont:

She has yet another fight with Mal, in which he says something especially cruel like "I'm not going to get on my knees and kiss your hand like your a lady. You're a whore."

Inara has a sort of chemical weapon in case of rape, so whomever attacks will die immediately after raping her. (I'm not saying this all as eloquently, I'm pre-coffee).

She's kidnapped by reavers in an attack. Mal and crew go in to the reaver ship to save her.

What they find is the entire crew of reavers, all dead, and Inara huddled on the floor, beaten half to death.

Later, in Inara's shuttle, it's only Zoe there, guarding her silently. Mal tried to come in, and Zoe opens a can of whup ass and tells Mal no fucking way is anyone coming in.

Mal gets past Zoe (yeah, right) and walks over to Inara's bed where she's curled up and post-traumatic. Gets on his knees, and kisses her hand.

And why was Joss humping a couch?

Because it was there.

The audience asked for an embarassing story which they could use to torture Joss at his thing tomorrow.