I really don't know how people managed to look busy before the internet.

I had one or two temp jobs where they wouldn't give me internet access. (Because...why would I need to access the network? I was just there to answer the phones!) I ended up reading a LOT of magazines.

I had a beau for 4 years who was 6'4" to my 5'nuthin".

He used to say that it didn't matter 'when you are horizontal'. I found that to be mostly true. During the vertical times, I became a champion of perching on solid objects for serious smooching.

I joked one year that his family and I should do a photo holiday card featuring the boys (all over 6'3") wearing snowflake sweaters with the girls (all under 5'4") standing in front. The shot would have been from the tops of our heads to the bottom of the boys' chins. "Christmas in the land of the giants and their pygmy women".

We broke up before that could happen...I'm pretty sure height had nothing to do with it.

Since all I really want in a guy is 6'2"-6'4", I can actually leave the taller ones for you nutjobs.

This is your version of "different strokes"? What have you done with our Cowgirl?

Was that slacking number self-reported?

That's what it sounds like:

The No. 1 state for wasting time was Missouri, where workers who responded to the survey reported slacking off 3 hours and 12 minutes a day.

The defensive quotes from Missouri are cracking me up.

"Nobody can match the work ethic of Missourians. This survey, which our busiest citizens did not want to waste their time on, cannot undermine decades of experience. Missouri workers are among the most productive in the world."

Yikes. An oil platform in the Gulf of Mexico is now listing 20-30 degrees after the hurricane: [link]

They are clients of ours - I wrote software that was used during the construction of this platform.

The most beautifully slack job I ever had was temping at the Harvard Business School during the summer. All the professors were away so they just needed somebody to open their mail, answer the phones and type up an occasional bill for some consulting. They were never in the office. I read all of One Hundred Years of Solitude on that job.

I read Heart of Darkness, including the introductory essays (famous one by Achebe), in a day while temping at NPR. And when I was done I was booooored.

I read all of One Hundred Years of Solitude on that job.

I'm sure it felt like real time, too.

I spent a summer translating a novel from the Spanish, while answering phones for a publicity firm. (I didn't finish in that summer, but got pretty far along.) I didn't have the internet, so it was that or Minesweeper or clipping the NY Times for mentions of our clients (which I also did).

I really don't know how people managed to look busy before the internet.

Put a piece of paper in the typewriter. Put an open book in the desk drawer. Open drawer slightly and read. Whenever someone gets close, close the drawer and assume a look of deep thought as you stare at the piece of paper.

Young whippersnappers. We didn't need any of these modern conveniences to slack off.

t gestures with cane